ARTICLES & BLOG
To Be or Not to Be? – That is the question or is it a choice? Be a Caterpillar, Become a Butterfly
This article is about learning, change growth, development and transformation.
This article is about learning, change growth, development and transformation.
“Until you value yourself you will not value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it. ”
The Success People Vs Unsuccessful people graphic I remember seeing many years ago, I loved it the moment I saw it and printed a few colour copies and had put up in bedroom and books. Does not need any more comment. Have a read and see what resonates and where gaps are for you.
Not sure of source - had seen many years ago
“We know what we are, but know not what we may be.”
This fabulous video from Master Shi Heng Yi sharing about Self Mastery is steeped with so much wisdom and insight. I have watched a few times and each time gained something. It really resonates with me and I see connection to my faith and spiritual path.
“To Be or Not to Be? – That is a question or is it a choice?
Be a Caterpillar, Become a Butterfly
By a Wanna Be Butterfly Shaileen Shah 26 Sep 2017
Dedicated to all the teachers and inspirers past, present and future; who have guided us to make this world better by making ourselves better. Lessons, values, guidelines, way of living learnt through family, friends, films, books, seminars, workshops, talks, teachers, TED talks, newsletters, articles, blogs, conversations and ponderings.
Behind you lies the past
Before you awaits the future
Be present, be here, now
Be blissful, joyful, happy and peaceful
Be conscious, conscientious, insightful and natural
Be energetic, be moving, be moved and be still
Be a seeker, aspirer, Divine, graceful and of service
Be wholesome, authentic, an observer and a witness
Be grateful, humble, generous and giving
Be charitable, donor, giver and receiver
Be compassionate, kind, caring and loving
Be forgiving, honest, straightforward and content
Be awake, alive, awesome, extraordinary and wonderful
Be careful, respectful, carefree and tolerant
Be a follower, leader, trailblazer and a guide
Be on The Path, be off the beaten track
Be the light, beacon, role model and mentor
Be a teacher, student, learning, teachable and sharer
Be growing, nurturing, developing and blossoming
Be listening, consoling, be consultative, and approachable
Be flexible, adaptable, open and perspective shifting
Be encouraging, supportive, dependable and helpful
Be proactive, responsible, accountable and resourceful
Be cooperative, patient, synergistic and part of the solution
Be going the extra mile, adding value, not giving up and keep moving forward
Be positive, enthusiastic, insightful and optimistic
Be focussed, steadfast, persistent, grounded and centred
Be brave, courageous, bold and fearless
Be creative, imaginative, visionary, daring and clear
Be connected, a team player, performer and game changer
Be prepared, planned, ready, organised and spontaneous
Be engaging, gregarious, humorous and funny
Be hospitable, welcoming, warm and big hearted
Be trustworthy, trusting, loyal, complete and full of integrity
Be mindful, aware, attentive, tuned in and be there
Be inquisitive, curious, and adventurous
Be healthy, wealthy and wise
Be better today than you were yesterday
Believe in yourself, have faith and move mountains
Be reflective, contemplative, introspective and meditative
Be the change, be transformative, evolving and a catalyst
Be the best that you can be, a masterpiece, unique and special
Be yourself, realise your potential and be free
Be a caterpillar, become a butterfly
Too busy to just be?
Be reminded it is a choice to be or not to be
Just Be.
”
A request dear friend and reader.
(1) If you have enjoyed some of the articles I have shared and found useful please reply to shaileen@happylifehabits.co.uk and let me know.
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Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good; supporting the UNs Sustainable Development Goals. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Happy New Year! See the year starts with Happy so be happy. I have recently gone through a year end review using a wonderful tool called the year end compass. I wrote about it last year when I first discovered it. This year I was able to spend a bit more time going through it more thoroughly to reflect on last year and to consider themes for this year. I found the process really enjoyable, useful and contemplative. I spread it over a few days as opposed to doing in one sitting. It allowed me to remember and savour the happy moments, absorb and accept the sadder moments, consider the things learnt and really appreciate the opportunities and moments of joy experienced. With that I gratefully thank all who have supported me on this journey; be it words of encouragement, coming to or sharing about workshops, investing in a happiness journal or two and encouraging others to do so also; creating opportunities for me to share at groups, communities and companies or reading this blog . Thank You.
A few questions from the year end compass:
What is the wisest decision I have made…?
The biggest risk I took …?
The biggest surprise of the year…?
The most important thing I did for others…?
Who are the three people who influenced you the most?
What are the the people you influenced the most?
Plus many more.
Then there are sections to look forward to this this year which included:
This year I will no longer procrastinate any more on…
This year I will be bravest when…
This year will be special for me because…
Take a moment to consider your answers to the questions .
I created a worksheet with some of these questions for the class I teach of 14-15 year olds at Veerayatan SCVP Jain School. It is part of work we are doing in sharing life skills with Habits and The Seven Habits of Highly Effective Teenagers being the focus. Will be interesting to see how it goes. Really enjoying researching, think about and developing the content to share.
The 3rd Monday in January is known as Blue Monday, a day when many people feel low or more depressed due to various factors. Last year I wrote about Blue Monday. Again my friends at the Museum of Happiness are hosting a Winter Happiness Festival on Sunday 19th January 2020 to coincide with Blue Monday. I am volunteering there, I have enjoyed the previous 2 festivals.
Speakers include:
Clinical psychologist Dr Shelley Kerr of Balanced Minds, who will share the science of self-compassion and offer practical tools and techniques to give you full permission to be kinder to yourself
Best-selling author and behavioural change expert Shahroo Izadi will share how self-kindness is the key to changing unwanted habits, and how to make meaningful sustained changes in any area of your life
Former contributing editor of Ethical Performance Magazine Adam Woodhall of Extinction Rebellion will motivate and inspire us on how to be kinder to animals and the planet
Founder of I am Circle Nina Bubamara will conclude with a reflective session to connect and reflect more deeply, champion our creative expression and individuality, and set strong intentions to take action for a happier, kinder world.
We’ll close with a loving kindness meditation for the world and some ecstatic dance to shake off what no longer serves you.
This is a fundraiser to help the museum continue to do the fantastic work it does. Details here if you want to get tickets.
On February 14th (Valentines Day) and February 28th, both Fridays I will be sharing workshops on Happier Relationships at Veerayatan SCVP Jain School in NW London. These sessions are free and open to all.
Resources
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About the Author
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good; supporting the UNs Sustainable Development Goals. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
WHAT’S MY PURPOSE? WHY AM I HERE?
(This article was commissioned for the Young Jains Magazine on the theme of Purpose Summer 2019)
These questions and other related ones are what many of us ponder and ask ourselves at various points in our life. Some find answers and begin living their purpose, others keep searching and some stop asking or never asked.
(This article was commissioned for the Young Jains Magazine on the theme of Purpose Summer 2019)
These questions and other related ones are what many of us ponder and ask ourselves at various points in our life. Some find answers and begin living their purpose, others keep searching and some stop asking or never asked.
There are many books, articles and workshops that are available to help answer “How do I find my purpose in life?”. Something can only be found if it is lost. I do not believe we find our purpose; I believe we uncover our purpose, our life's calling. It has always been there, just need to be uncovered. This is likened to the Michael Angelo quotes:
“I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free”
“Every block of stone has a statue inside and it is the task of the sculptor to discover it”
Our purpose is within us and our journey is to uncover it and live it.
When I was a teenager doing the examinations in GCSEs (O levels) and A levels I did not know what I wanted to do as I grew up. My older brother Raju was studying Computer Science/IT and suggested I do that as a degree. 4 years later with a degree, masters and having met my life partner Harshna, I was looking for a job in a recession hit economy. After months for applying for various jobs and not having any luck; Raju showed me an article in a computing magazine about a US consultancy firm that was setting up offices in Europe. I tracked down the phone number for the company (pre- Google); made contact and sent my C.V. I got a job as a trainee consultant and was one of the first 10 UK employees. I was sent to the US on an assignment for a few weeks (become a few months). During this time; the early 90s; I was introduced to the now classic book Stephen Covey’s The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. During the same time I attended my first of many personal development seminars. I flew back from the US for 4 nights to attend Tony Robbins (No1 Success Coach) Unleash The Power Weekend (UPW) which involved walking on hot coals on the first night of the seminar! Also around the same time I was attending YJ events and becoming more active. These experiences and learnings from them were conducive to uncovering my purpose. I was keen to put into practice and share what I had learnt. This led to me joining the YJ committee and being on convention committees.
The 7 Habits book has had a phenomenal impact, in particular habit 2 “Begin with the End in Mind”. This has an exercise to write a personal mission statement. This I did and has been guiding most of the decisions and activities I have been involved with since the mid 90s.
I have not often publicly shared my personal mission statement; however here it is to help inspire others to think about theirs:
“I continuously contribute, learn, grow and make a positive difference to all in my environment adding tremendous value.
I am a caring, loving, supportive family member and friend.
I act with integrity, truthfulness and do the right thing.
I use my time effectively, am a creator of wealth, value and abundance. I achieve balance”
This has been my North Star, my compass and resulted in my active involvement in Young Jains, Shree Chandana Vidhya Peeth (SCVP), Museum of Happiness, Service Space, Oshwal and Shishukunj.
This mission and my values have been challenged even sometimes compromised. I worked in Finance Technology in Royal Bank of Scotland (RBS the bank) during the RBS takeover of NatWest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis during which RBS had to be bailed out. Upon leaving RBS through redundancy in 2016 I took time out to consider the next chapter in my life. During this time through various experiences, conversations, reading and pondering that added to existing ones; pondering on what is important to me; reflecting on my mission statement; has led to an uncovering of my current purpose in life: Being a Happiness Coach and through my business Happy Life Habits : Positively Impacting Happiness and Well Being Levels.
A concept that has become popular is Ichigai a Japense term.
“Ikigai is a Japanese concept that means “a reason for being.” The word “ikigai” is usually used to indicate the source of value in one’s life or the things that make one’s life worthwhile. The word translated to English roughly means “thing that you live for” or “the reason for which you wake up in the morning.” Wikipedia
”
Japanese concept of Ikigai
Purpose and Meaning are components of The Science of Happiness for a happy life.
I share the definition of happiness from researcher and author of “The How of Happiness”, Sonja Lyubomirsky:
“The experience of joy, contentment, or positive wellbeing, combined with a sense of one’s life is good, meaningful and worthwhile”
In a succinct way I guess my purpose and perhaps the purpose for everyone is :
“To be happy and help others be happy”
That’s why I am here. How about you?
About the Author
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good; supporting the UNs Sustainable Development Goals. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
START YOUR YEAR END REVIEW NOW
Many people in December do a end of year review to reflect on the past 12 months. They go through their calendar, diary, journal and memories to reflect and capture aspects from the year. There is a great free tool called the year compass that can help with this process available from yearcompass.com/gb. The process can be insightful, heartwarming, provide learning and growth. Instead of waiting till the end of the year to do it why not do one at the end of each month, This has the advantage of making the end of year process quicker and smoother, less chance of missing things and the benefit of getting a good feeling as you savour and reflect at the end of the month and the opportunity to savour each following month.
One way to do it is to copy some of the items from the yearcompass into a word document or google sheet and title with the chosen month then add to it each month end.
Things to consider for inclusion are:
What did I achieve this month?
What were insights I gained?
What did I learn?
What am I grateful for?
What was challenging and how did I deal with it?
Who helped me?
Who did I help?
What could I have done better?
What am I looking forward to this coming month?
The YearCompass breaks it down into a few categories which include:
Personal Life & Family
Belongings
Friends, community
Intellectual
Finances
Work, Studies, Profession
Relaxation, Hobbies, Creativity
Heath, Fitness
Emotional, Spiritual
Bucket List
This is an expansion of the 4 human dimensions of : Physical, Mental, Social/Emotional and Spiritual.
YearCompass gives opportunity to consider the time period in six sentences such as :”The wisest decision I made…”. and six questions such as “What is the best thing you have discovered about yourself?”.
There is much more to the review doc than shared here, however, hopefully this gives you a feel.
Enjoy reviewing and reflecting