ARTICLES & BLOG
A Christmas Care - Role (Carol) Who Cares? for the Carer? Dementia/Parkinson's/Old Age/Grief/Loneliness
In the story of Jesus’ birth there are three kings who come bearing gifts. In Charles Dickens’ The Christmas Carol there are 4 ghosts who visit Ebeneezer Scrooge. His business partner Jacob Marley and the ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future.
On 11th Dec 2020 our world changed when my father suddenly passed (https://www.happylifehabits.co.uk/news/2020/12/24/live-love-learn-amp-legacy) away within 36 hours. He was the primary carer for my mum. We had the gifts and ghosts of : Old age, Grief, Loneliness, Parkinsons and Dementia. That was part of our inheritance.
Without those gifts and ghosts this article would not be written, published and shared.
As time goes by the probability that someone close to you will be impacted by dementia is increasing.
“One of the hardest things in life is to know that you can not stop the decline as you witness firsthand the diminishing cognitive capacity of a loved one due to progressive incurable neurological conditions such as Parkinson’s or Dementia.
To observe them becoming a shadow of themselves day by day; the impact on their physical, mental, emotional, social and spiritual wellbeing. Knowing there is nothing you can do to stop that decline. Experiencing the loss each day as anticipatory grief.”
Shaileen Shah - Carer, Happy Life Habits Coach, Speaker and Trainer.
This article is about my role as a carer for my mum who is elderly, grieving, lonely and suffering from the progressive and incurable neurological conditions of both Parkinson’s and Dementia. It shares the perspective of the carer, the challenges faced, how best to look after yourself as well as how to look after and interact with someone who has these conditions or someone you are caring for.
I salute all those who are carers of any type and ask you to support those who you know who are doing a caring role.
In the story of Jesus’ birth there are three kings who come bearing gifts. In Charles Dickens’ The Christmas Carol there are 4 ghosts who visit Ebeneezer Scrooge. His business partner Jacob Marley and the ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future.
On 11th Dec 2020 our world changed when my father suddenly passed (https://www.happylifehabits.co.uk/news/2020/12/24/live-love-learn-amp-legacy) away within 36 hours. He was the primary carer for my mum. We had the gifts and ghosts of : Old age, Grief, Loneliness, Parkinson’s and Dementia. That was part of our inheritance.
Without those gifts and ghosts this article would not be written, published and shared.
As time goes by, the probability that someone close to you will be impacted by dementia is increasing.
“One of the hardest things in life is to know that you cannot stop the decline as you witness firsthand the diminishing cognitive capacity of a loved one due to progressive incurable neurological conditions such as Parkinson’s or Dementia.
To observe them becoming a shadow of themselves day by day; the impact on their physical, mental, emotional, social and spiritual wellbeing. Knowing there is nothing you can do to stop that decline. Experiencing the loss each day as anticipatory grief.”
This article is about my role as a carer for my mum who is elderly, grieving, lonely and suffering from the progressive and incurable neurological conditions of both Parkinson’s and Dementia. It shares the perspective of the carer, the challenges faced, how best to look after yourself as well as how to look after and interact with someone who has these conditions or someone you are caring for.
I salute all those who are carers of any type and ask you to support those who you know who are doing a caring role.
“Once, a student approached Rumi and asked, How should I deal with the pain and suffering in life?”
Rumi, in his wisdom, decided to share a story:
”There was a man who sought the wisdom of a great sage, hoping to find a way to escape his suffering. The sage looked at the man and said, ‘I will help you, but first, you must do something for me. Take this spoon, fill it with oil, and walk through the town without spilling a drop.’
”The man thought this task was simple enough and agreed. He took the spoon, filled it with oil, and began to walk through the town. As he carefully balanced the spoon, he couldn’t help but focus all his attention on not spilling any oil.
”When he returned to the sage, the sage asked, ‘Did you see the beautiful flowers in the town square? Did you notice the children playing and the laughter of families?’ The man realized he had been so fixated on the spoon that he hadn’t noticed anything else.
”The sage then said, ‘This is the key to dealing with pain. Just as you were so focused on the spoon that you missed the beauty around you, when you are consumed by your suffering, you miss the beauty of life. Pain is like the spoon, and life is like the town. Don’t let the pain consume your entire focus. Remember to look around and appreciate the beauty that still exists.’”
The student understood the sage’s message: while pain and suffering are part of life, it’s essential not to let them overshadow the beauty and joy that can be found in every moment. This story serves as a reminder that even in the face of pain, there is an opportunity to find meaning and beauty in life.
”
From Parkinson's UK (https://www.parkinsons.org.uk/information-and-support/what-parkinsons)
Parkinson's is a progressive neurological condition. This means that it causes problems in the brain and gets worse over time. People with Parkinson's don't have enough of the chemical dopamine in their brain because some of the nerve cells that make it have stopped working.
From Dementia UK (https://www.dementiauk.org/information-and-support/about-dementia/what-is-dementia/):
Dementia is an umbrella term for a range of progressive conditions that affect the brain.
Each type of dementia stops a person’s brain cells (neurones) working properly in specific areas, affecting their ability to remember, think and speak.
Doctors typically use the word ‘‘dementia’’ to describe common symptoms – such as memory loss, confusion, and problems with speech and understanding – that get worse over time.
Some films and books about Dementia:
Films:
You, Me Aur Hum - Bollywood movie with Kajol and Ajay Devgn. Powerful scenes including one where Kajol has gone shopping and forgets her way home.
Still Alice - Powerful story of a young professor diagnosed with Alzheimer’s soon after her 50th birthday.
The Father - very moving depiction with Anthony Hopkins
The NoteBook
Books
Mum, Me, White Lies and Tea: My journey into the heart of dementia - Ten lessons from accompanying my mum on her journey with dementia by my friend Nick Williams. (Get in touch if you want a signed copy)
Trials and Tribulations of a Carer for Parkinson’s and Dementia
A typical day (though there is no typical day) in my life as a carer for my mum who has progressive incurable neurological conditions Parkinson’s and Dementia. This means she sometimes does not know what to do, cannot follow a sequence of instructions, needs to be told repeatedly, is not independently mobile requiring a Zimmer frame to move about, can lose balance and have a fall, lives in a different reality and can get frustrated easily and have a change in mood. I share here some of the trials and tribulations to give an insight into some of the challenges a Carer has. Routine is important as is regularly giving the Parkinson’s medications at the correct time 5-6 times a day.
Robin Sharma shares the 5am club. Those who get up at 5am and use the hour to reflect, do journaling, learning and exercise. On some days I am part of the 2am, 3:30am, 4am, 4:30am club and everything in between too. (As I write this section mid morning we have been up from 2am -7am). This is when my mum has woken up during the early hours to go to the bathroom or just feeling unsettled. It can be no wakes up, 1 or 2 wakeups or multiple wakeups over a few hours. This broken sleep / sleep deprivation and intensity of interaction can lead to energy lows, heavy head, brain fog impacting plans for the day.
A trip to the bathroom is a 20 min round trip. On average 2 or 3 per night. Sometimes you have just taken, tucked into bed and within 5 minutes need to visit again.
Getting her ready to go to bed involves giving last meds, helping to get changed, settle into bed etc. This is a 30-40 min activity.
She asks for water just after you have got her tucked up into bed.
Due to the medications and changes in the brain she can experience hallucinations, different reality, emotional roller coaster and be illogical.
Both mum and I can share angry words or actions due to stress, lack of sleep, frustration, low energy.
Sometimes when I am on a zoom call I have to excuse myself or switch off video and audio in order to attend to mum’s needs.
When doing deep work or creative work the flow can be disrupted due to distractions and disturbances in looking after mum. This involves task switching which takes up energy.
Even though my father passed away about 3 years ago, mum asks “When will he come? Where is he?”. Having been brought up to tell the truth and not telling lies being a part of my faith I initially used to explain to her that he has passed away. From learning about dementia from literature and the Dementia Club UK Awareness Training we now have to tell a lie or half truths and say he is out but fine or not to worry and he will come later. We have to step into her reality and reassure her.
Each day can be like Groundhog Day, during the day having the same conversation or giving the same instructions again and again, as for them they have forgotten and it is for the first time in their reality.
No real concept of time.
Excellent video about Dementia, I really resonate with this : https://youtu.be/EuRHHmXbzYs
We are fortunate that we share caring responsibilities over the family members and get support from external carers. However if the carer does not come on a particular day it means we have to drop plans and shift focus and responsibilities.
Giving Care
This brilliant article I got from Dementia Club UK in their weekly email. These tips can apply to anyone with whatever they are dealing with. I get it wrong so often, this helps to remind and refocus.
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/caregiving-tips-teepa-snow-180395.htm
Dementia Caregiving Tips from Teepa Snow
My name is Teepa Snow, and I am a dementia care and education specialist. My personal mission is to better the lives of people with dementia—as well as the lives of their caregivers—by sharing what I have learned. An occupational therapist by training, I have been called “the horse whisperer of dementia.”
It can be difficult, frustrating and confusing to care for a person with dementia. In order to be successful in changing behavior when frustration mounts, it comes down to how we respond to what is happening and what we choose to do.
Five Tips to Help Dementia Caregivers Cope
1. Step Back
When an interaction is not going well, you have a choice: you can push your agenda and watch things get worse, or you can step back and think. What’s happening is often more complicated than it appears on the surface. In an effort to be helpful, you may have created a problem. The person who is challenging you is doing the very best they can with what cognitive abilities they have left. Stop judging them.
Learn to be a good detective. Your brain works better than theirs, so use it! Step back and assess their abilities. Know what you are working with. Try to figure out what might be driving the person. Analyze the situation. What are you seeing? What are you hearing? What might be their unmet emotional need? How about their unmet physical need? Why might they be doing what they are doing? What are they trying to communicate? You need to try to see things from their point of view.
2. Respond (Don’t React)
What you thought would happen didn’t happen. The person did not react the way you wanted (or expected) them to. You’re getting frustrated and you’re getting angry. What to do?
Stop reacting and stop your behavior of trying to correct them. Stop pointing out errors or mistakes. Stop trying to fix things. Stop raising your voice, and stop pushing your agenda. “Remember, I already told you that!” Do you find yourself repeating that sentence? It’s time to stop! Don’t argue with them.
What will be more helpful is to use the words they have given you. It’s called reflective narrative language and it will support their ability to make connections. Repeat back to them what they have said to you—acknowledge and validate what they are feeling. It is not helpful to focus on who is right or wrong, but it is often helpful to apologize (for whatever happened). Say something like, “I’m sorry this happened,” or, “I’m sorry I upset you, I was trying to help.”
3. Make Plans, but Expect Them to Change
Create a plan, think it through and get organized. Have a schedule. You know what you want to happen. However, when it doesn’t, you have to be flexible.
If your plan isn’t working, you can’t force it! It’s part of your care agenda. Adjust your plans as needed. It was just a plan! Figure out where to go or what to do instead. Having alternatives ready is necessary and helpful. Create Plan A, but always have a Plan B, Plan C or even Plan D at the ready.
4. Figure out What You Can (and Can’t) Control
Stop trying to control what you can’t control. This is so important to realize. You can’t control their dementia or their past (who they’ve been or their routines and preferences that may now be exaggerated or problematic). And, you can’t control/fix/change their behavior.
You do have some control, however, over their environment—their physical and sensory experiences. This includes where they are, the objects they use or have access to, and how you guide or help to direct their time. Consider how you can make a difference for both of you.
Pay attention to what helps them feel valued and important, as well as when they relax and regain their energy. Try to prioritize the most important things and what must get done. Know your agenda, but don’t show your agenda. Practice recognizing if/when something doesn’t go as you hoped and managing your response.
You can figure out how to get yourself under control, and you can build your skills and knowledge about how to better live with dementia. Change what you can change and then let go of the rest.
5. Take Care of Yourself
When it’s not working, when something you tried to do didn’t work, or when you’re getting frustrated or angry, you absolutely need to learn to take a time out. It’s critical to step away from the situation. Take at least three deep breaths—breathe in and out deeply!
When you are frustrated, angry or in despair, the person you are caring for picks up on and reacts to your stress level and intensity. They may not fully understand what you are feeling or why, but they will be impacted by your tone of voice, body language and emotional state. When you’re angry, you’re no good to them or to yourself.
Breathing deeply will help you get back to neutral, lower your stress level, and help you regain perspective about the situation you are trying to problem solve. Also, don’t hesitate to ask for help. Putting support systems in place for surprising times when living with dementia is critical. Dementia care is hard work!
About Teepa Snow
Teepa is an occupational therapist and dementia education specialist who works closely with dementia specialty service providers to develop and optimize programs and services to people living with dementia, their care partners and family members.
Communicating and Interacting
Here are some tips, rules and information that help with communication and interaction. Useful for general communication not just when with Parkinson’s Dementia patients.
If you interact with someone with Dementia, this is a really useful list of Golden Rules as is the Parkinson’s Dementia leaflet linked at the end
“16 Things I would Want if I Got Dementia”
by Rachael Wonderlin (rachaelwonderlin.com.)
(Copyright Registration No. TX0008332487)
If I get dementia, I’d like my family to hang this wish list up on the wall where I live. I want them to remember these things.
1. If I get dementia, I want my friends and family to embrace my reality.
2. If I think my spouse is still alive, or if I think we’re visiting my parents for dinner, let me believe those things. I’ll be much happier for it.
3. If I get dementia, don’t argue with me about what is true for me versus what is true for you.
4. If I get dementia, and I am not sure who you are, do not take it personally. My timeline is confusing to me.
5. If I get dementia, and can no longer use utensils, do not start feeding me. Instead, switch me to a finger-food diet, and see if I can still feed myself.
6. If I get dementia, and I am sad or anxious, hold my hand and listen. Do not tell me that my feelings are unfounded.
7. If I get dementia, I don’t want to be treated like a child. Talk to me like the adult that I am.
8. If I get dementia, I still want to enjoy the things that I’ve always enjoyed. Help me find a way to exercise, read, and visit with friends.
9. If I get dementia, ask me to tell you a story from my past.
10. If I get dementia, and I become agitated, take the time to figure out what is bothering me.
11. If I get dementia, treat me the way that you would want to be treated.
12. If I get dementia, make sure that there are plenty of snacks for me in the house. Even now if I don’t eat I get angry, and if I have dementia, I may have trouble explaining what I need.
13. If I get dementia, don’t talk about me as if I’m not in the room.
14. If I get dementia, don’t feel guilty if you cannot care for me 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It’s not your fault, and you’ve done your best. Find someone who can help you, or choose a great new place for me to live.
15. If I get dementia, and I live in a dementia care community, please visit me often.
16. If I get dementia, don’t act frustrated if I mix up names, events, or places. Take a deep breath. It’s not my fault.
17. If I get dementia, make sure I always have my favourite music playing within earshot.
18. If I get dementia, and I like to pick up items and carry them around, help me return those items to their original place.
19. If I get dementia, don’t exclude me from parties and family gatherings.
20. If I get dementia, know that I still like receiving hugs or handshakes.
21. If I get dementia, remember that I am still the person you know and love.
Click here for the Parkinson’s Leaflet
Self Care
“I can’t afford to become ill. I have to stay in good health and energy in order to do my role as primary carer for my mum who has progressive incurable neurological conditions Parkinson’s and Dementia.”
Health, energy and Self Care are all priorities. I actively, daily and purposefully attend to these with routines and habits I choose. We can’t give from an empty cup.”
What are the 5 balls of life?
A speech about life being a game of ‘5 balls’ has been falsely attributed to Google CEO Sundar Pichai. It appears to come from a 1991 Georgia Tech commencement speech given by former Coca-Cola CEO Brian Dyson.
https://www.reuters.com/article/factcheck-quote-sundar-pichai-idUSL1N2SE1SE/
“Imagine life is a game of 5 balls that you manipulate in the air, trying not to fall these balls.
One of them is rubber and the rest is glass. The five balls are: work, family, health, friends, soul. It will not be long before you realize that (work) is a rubber ball.
Whenever you fall, you will jump again, while the other balls are made of glass.
If one of them falls, it will not return to its previous form. It will either be damaged, bruised, cracked, or even scattered.
You have to be aware of that and strive for it.
Manage your work efficiently during working hours, take the time to be assured of your sincerity, give the necessary time to your family and friends, take appropriate rest, and take care of your health. If you are gone, it isn’t easy to return as it was.”
My habits and routines for Health, Energy and Self Care, most done on a daily basis.
Drink a glass or small bottle of water (500ml or so) to rehydrate
Open the curtains to let natural light in
Using my Happiness journal to note
3 things that you are grateful for
3 intentions for the day, what would make the day great
3 positive affirmations
Review my personal mission statement, values, goals (morning and evening)
A few minutes of mindfulness / meditation with app or focus on breath etc
Choose and share daily positive quote on Happy Life Habits Daily Quote WhatsApp Group
Take time to Stretch / exercise by doing:
3 Sun salutations (surya namaskar from yoga)
3 pushups or situps or burpees
Recite prayers
Read a few pages of a book, watch or listen to something positive that I can learn from
Have a healthy, nutritious breakfast
Mid morning fruit break
Focused work
Planning
Regular breaks away from the desk computer
Go for a walk in morning or afternoon
Spend time with family/friends
Reduce mobile phone use during meals
Journaling
3 highlights or good things from the day
How could you have made the day better?
What did you learn during the day?
Go to bed around same time each day
Additionals that are not daily
Time for laughter – live comedy, shows, films, shared jokes
Live experiences: music, theatre, art, sport, travel
Sauna or massage
Time in nature, gardening
Volunteering, Service, Community, Faith
Reflecting on achievements/qualities – monthly, quarterly or every 6 months
These habits positively impact my health, energy and wellbeing and cover the scope of the 5 well being dimensions of Physical, Mental, Emotional, Social and Spiritual while at the same time releasing happy chemicals and flushing the stress ones away.
This is what I am learning
A friend said that they could not do the caring for a parent as it is a big commitment and sacrifice. For me it is not a sacrifice but a way of serving - though to be honest sometimes frustration and not having control on a lot of things makes it feel like a sacrifice. It’s a way of working through my karma.
This is what I am learning
Apply the tools, practices and routines, Develop Habits, Cultivate virtues. Reflect and Introspect. Accept reality.
Mindfulness, being present and in the moment
Slowing down
Centre and ground yourself
Understanding emotions better
Listening with full attention
Empathy, Compassion, Care
Connection is so important
Patience
Go with the flow
Proactive, Plan and focus on what’s important now and what need to be done soon
Focused moments of work
Self care, practices and routines
Sleep, rest and recovery
Keep being taught the lesson till we learn it
Resilience
Accepting the things I can not control
Responding rather than reacting
Not to take things personally
Fundamentals : Eat, Sleep, Move, Breathe, Focus
Very conscious of how I use my time, what I say yes to and what I commit to
People call less and visit less
“THE SPIRITUAL WARRIOR’S PRAYER
I pray not to be protected from life’s battles,
But to have the courage to conquer them fearlessly.
I pray not to escape from my struggles,
But to learn the lessons the universe is trying to teach me.
I pray not to work for fame and recognition,
But to make it my mission to love and serve others in all that I do.
I pray not to measure my wealth and success by what I own,
But by how grateful and abundant I feel in my heart.
And I pray not for my circumstances to change so that I feel happy,
But to be a beacon of light in the world wherever God places me.
”
For a better Future we have to be very Present when the Dementia patient is living in their Past.
Use it or lose it
As I have understood it, those who have Dementia have experienced a shrinkage in their brain. My theory based on what I have learnt and having no medical research is by keeping the brain active, learning new knowledge and skills, practising gratitude, journaling and mindfulness/meditation, exercising help to increase the neural connections, the grey matter and different parts of the brain thereby delaying or preventing the shrinkage. These practices also help our health, happiness and wellbeing.
The Heroic Coaching and App helps me with my Energy, Work and Love (Relationships/Connection).
Our 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Training Course I am immensely proud of as I feel it not only helps with happiness, mental and emotional well being, hope, optimism and resilience but also is releasing the happy chemicals washing out the stress ones. We know stress exacerbates inflammation and all underlying illness or disease we have.
People with Parkinson's don't have enough of the chemical dopamine in their brain because some of the nerve cells that make it have stopped working. Gratitude releases dopamine. What if the regular practice of gratitude releasing dopamines keeps those nerve cells active, healthy, working well and alive for longer?
The hardback, cloth bound Happiness Journal feels lovely in our hands, the act of thinking, reflecting and writing makes use of different parts of our brain at the same time (sight, touch, feelings, thoughts, memory, future thinking. motor skills etc) thus keeping them engaged and active. As shared in Gratitude is my Superpower - gratitude is a higher vibrational frequency energy.
We are going to run limited sessions of the 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training course specifically for:
Carers
Coping with Grief
General Wellbeing
For Carers attendees will only be carers giving it a particular focus and support.
For Coping with Grief attendees will only be those who have experienced a loss and are working through the grief process giving it a particular focus and support.
The General Wellbeing session will be open to all.
If you are interested or know someone who may benefit from either 1, 2 or 3 please join the waiting list or message me.
If you are involved with a charity or organisation that supports Dementia, Parkinson’s, Grief or Carers (for any condition) I would love to explore the opportunity to make the 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course available to support patients, staff, volunteers or carers with their mental and emotional wellbeing. Or to give a talk from a Carer’s perspective.
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Resources
Some films and books about Dementia:
Films:
You, Me Aur Hum - Bollywood movie with Kajol and Ajay Devgn. Powerful scenes including one where Kajol has gone shopping and forgets her way home.
Still Alice - Powerful story of a young professor diagnosed with Alzheimer’s after her 50th birthday.
The Father - very moving depiction with Anthony Hopkins
The NoteBook
Books
Mum, Me, White Lies and Tea: My journey into the heart of dementia - Ten lessons from accompanying my mum on her journey with dementia by my friend Nick Williams. (Get in touch if you want a signed copy).
Organisations
Parkinsons UK https://www.parkinsons.org.uk/ - great resources including leaflets on specific aspects
Dementia Club UK https://dementiaclubuk.org.uk/ - resources / training and support sessions for carers and those with the condition
Alzheimer’s UK https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/ - wonderful Caring for a Person with Dementia book (free)
Barnet Carers https://barnetcarers.org/ - local borough carers support
How mindfulness can help cognition https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/five_ways_mindfulness_helps_you_age_better
This has relevant content in relation to exercise and brain cognition.
https://youtu.be/UyNotKnAFkM?si=FEUF0gAGzl3wiYLp
Another great video that links foods, diet and dementia.
https://youtu.be/98szU7WJySk?si=uKcmni03JpDTd1t6
Shaileen Shah - Happy Life Habits Coach, Speaker & Trainer
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list and join the Happy Life Habits Community WhatsApp Group
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Happy Life Habits Positively Impacting Happiness & Wellbeing Levels
Mental Health Awareness Week: Anxiety Resources
The Week of Mental Health Awareness is ending. Mental Health is ongoing. We need to put in effort and practice to maintain good Mental Health and Mental Fitness.
Included in this blog article is the recording of the Anxiety Master Class sharing a concept from the Bollywood film The 3 Idiots, suggestions on dealing with exam/test anxiety/stress and actual scientific backed practices to help cope with anxiety. We are also sharing the resources such as videos, articles and pdfs shared during Mental Health Awareness Week.
To live life fully, develop skills and habits for positivity, happiness, resilience and productivity
Happy Life Habits provides 1 to 1 coaching, group coaching, workshops, training and regular learning sessions and programs such as Master Mind Group, Inner Compass the 30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course. All with science, practices and information to help you go from Theory to Practice to Mastery.
The Week of Mental Health Awareness is ending. Mental Health is ongoing. We need to put in effort and practice to maintain good Mental Health and Mental Fitness.
Included in this blog article is the recording of the Anxiety Master Class sharing a concept from the Bollywood film The 3 Idiots, suggestions on dealing with exam/test anxiety/stress and actual scientific backed practices to help cope with anxiety. We are also sharing the resources such as videos, articles and pdfs shared during Mental Health Awareness Week.
To live life fully, develop skills and habits for positivity, happiness, resilience and productivity
Happy Life Habits provides 1 to 1 coaching, group coaching, workshops, training and regular learning sessions and programs such as Master Mind Group, Inner Compass the 30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course. All with science, practices and information to help you go from Theory to Practice to Mastery.
Here is the Happy Life Habits Anxiety Master Class
Happy Life Habits Daily Mental Health Video Series
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Mental Health Awareness Week 2023 : 15th - 21st May: Theme Anxiety
Happy Life Habits (HLH) is again supporting Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW) and the theme of Anxiety.
Mental Health and anxiety is about what is going on inside with our thoughts and feelings. We all feel moments of anxiety due to various things which can include health, work, loved ones, money worries, exams and life/world events.
You are not alone in feeling anxiety. It has been show to increase in recent years.
According to a survey by the Mental Health Foundation 25% (1 in 4) adults reported feeling anxious.
It's how we cope with it that matters. HLH has a dedicated Mental Health WhatsApp group as part of its Community. During MHAW we will share daily tips, quotes, resources to cope with anxiety.
Join HLH Mental Health WhatsApp Group https://chat.whatsapp.com/D6ILNpZcxQ1KT8OAlwZIma
Happy Life Habits (HLH) is again supporting Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW) and the theme of Anxiety.
Mental Health and anxiety is about what is going on inside with our thoughts and feelings. We all feel moments of anxiety due to various things which can include health, work, loved ones, money worries, exams and life/world events.
You are not alone in feeling anxiety. It has been show to increase in recent years.
According to a survey by the Mental Health Foundation 25% (1 in 4) adults reported feeling anxious.
It's how we cope with it that matters. HLH has a dedicated Mental Health WhatsApp group as part of its Community. During MHAW we will share daily tips, quotes, resources to cope with anxiety.
On Thurs 18th May we have these free events:
(1) Gratitude for Wellbeing Workshop for Mind in Enfield & Barnet
(2) MasterClass on Coping with Anxiety 8-9pm ( Zoom details will be shared in WhatsApp group)
Join the Happy Life Habits dedicated Mental Health WhatsApp group
I just couldn't wait to share this. Yesterday I spent a few hours curating additional resources for Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW) starting next week which included watching more than a dozen TED Talks.
I've got some fantastic material including an anxiety test, TED Talks, Quotes, Articles and the HLH MHAW Video series.
I will start sharing this today on the HLH Mental Health WhatsApp group today as it spans more than a week's worth of content.
During MHAW there will be about 3 or 4 messages throughout the day to share the content: Video, Quote, Article, TED Talk.
I watched all the short HLH MHAW Video series which I had shot during the pandemic. The material in my biased opinion is still awesome.
Here is the intro video - please watch, the title page has the topics.
Each video is short, content rich, has my personal experience, science/facts, an inspiring quote and most importantly an action for you to do each day.
Only in taking action will we make a difference and change. Information is information. When applied, actioned and lived it becomes experience and wisdom.
Here is one of the first TED Talks I curated a few weeks back, it is packed with great information and also has 2 practices you can immediately apply to help with anxiety. Reassuringly the 2 practices are shared in the mini video series.
Here is link to Anxiety Test
https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/quizzes/results/stress_and_anxiety
How did you score?
What an amazing Coronation concert. Absolutely loved watching it on TV. Lionel Richie, Katy Perry and Take That rocked it.
Do you think they were anxious? If so, they certainly did not show it. They owned the stage, the moment and engaged and connected with the audience both at Windsor Castle and those watching at home.
Watch the video with Katy Perry and Take That videos - they exudes calm confidence and you can see the joy in their performances.
How did they cope with any anxiety?
I believe they all have learnt to develop calm confidence, an antidote to anxiety.
What makes you feel anxiety?
We all feel moments of anxiety due to various things which can include health, work, loved ones, money worries, exams and life/world events.
How do you cope with Anxiety?
Calm Confidence is something we will share at the Free Happy Life Habits Anxiety Master Class in support of Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW). We will also share :
What is Anxiety?
Symptoms
Ways to Cope
Do actionable activities
Q&A
The zoom link will be shared in the HLH Mental Health WhatsApp Group.
Starting soon and also during MHAW we will share daily resources including videos, quotes, articles, actions etc. in the Mental Health Group.
Please share with those who you think may benefit from this.
I am hoping to write an article with various resources and additional material after MHAW.
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Inner Cheerleader instead of Inner Critic
Inner Cheerleader instead of Inner Critic
2, 4, 6 8 Who Do We Appreciate?
Do you sometimes amaze yourself?
We often succumb to the inner critic we all have who tells us we can't do it, we not worthy, we are not good enough, it's going to fail etc.
I believe we have an Inner Cheerleader too.
Inner Cheerleader instead of Inner Critic
2, 4, 6 8 Who Do We Appreciate?
Do you sometimes amaze yourself?
We often succumb to the inner critic we all have who tells us we can't do it, we not worthy, we are not good enough, it's going to fail etc.
I believe we have an Inner Cheerleader too. I amazed myself yesterday. I went for a walk and chose to listen to the People on Purpose podcast by David Roberts which released the episode I am in on 1st Feb. We had recorded it end of last year so I had forgotten some of what we have covered.
It's bloody brilliant if I humbly say so myself, so rich in content, David has asked questions which give breadth and depth covering so much in 60 mins about life, happiness, wellbeing, stress, work life balance, habits, routines, practices, planning, my journey, personal development, science of happiness and spirituality.
Here are the show notes:
For this episode, David is joined by Shaileen Shah who is a happiness coach. He is the founder of Happy Life Habits. A business that helps people, communities, and companies to be happier, kinder, and more effective, and to respond in a meaningful way to the challenges that life and indeed wider society throws at us on a daily basis. Shaileen shares his own learning journey. Explaining how he explored the science of happiness and sharing some of these experiments and the results. Shaileen explains how to develop habits that naturally release the happy chemicals and flush away the stress chemicals. Something that automatically makes you feel happier as well as benefiting your health and improving the balance in your life.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
Shaileen´s approach is informed by scientific studies into happiness as well as by cultural practices. Doing the things that naturally release the happy chemicals in your body is powerful. Hedonic happiness is fleeting. Eudaimonic happiness goes far deeper. Pro-social practices contribute massively to happiness. Acknowledge negative emotions like anger, but don't dwell on them. You have to actively counter society's negative bias. Shaileen shares several ways to do this. Connection with others is really important. Be aware of what you have achieved in the past year. It can be used as fuel to take you further. Take stock 4 or 5 times a year. Life is short, make the absolute most of it.
BEST MOMENTS
‘With that timeout, I revisited and really looked at the things which were important to me, I reflected, I looked at my values again,’ ‘Happiness is not just a fleeting emotion, it's bigger than that.’ ‘There is flex in my planning, if an opportunity comes along, which I hadn't planned for, but it feels right … I say yes to this’
It is 60 mins, take 10 minutes and listen today, if you like what you hear listen to another 10 today or tomorrow and repeat. (use link in original post or one shared in comments)
What's your Inner Cheerleader cheering you on about?
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Back to the Future: Creating memories to Savour
The word savour (savor in American English) is an interesting word, it is a verb. It has at least 2 meanings in the dictionary:
To fully enjoy the taste or smell of something
To fully enjoy a time or experience
Back to the Future The Musical
The word savour (savor in American English) is an interesting word, it is a verb. It has at least 2 meanings in the dictionary:
To fully enjoy the taste or smell of something
To fully enjoy a time or experience
I feel the first definition is limited to taste and smell when I feel it should be all the senses. Another definition I feel encompasses the sentiment better :
to enjoy food or an experience slowly, in order to enjoy it as much as possible
This extends to one more which is the one we will use in this article:
attempt to fully feel, enjoy, and extend our positive experiences
The practice of savouring leads to more happiness. We can savour all three tenses of time: Past, Present and Future. I have enjoyed this practice. I share a few examples here.
Savouring the Past
Recently I enjoyed reminiscing about a convention that I co-led 20 years ago for Young Jains, a faith organisation I volunteer for. The experience 20 years ago was amazing, creative, high energy and innovative with wonderful team work. Individually I enjoyed seeing some photos, reading a souvenir magazine and listening to music from the event. We hosted a 20 Year catch up and some people who had attended 20 years ago joined sharing their experiences and memories. This led to a feel good energy, re-living the positive experiences and memories and a sense of community and connection. A benefit of savouring the past positive experiences is you get to live them again and create new memories.
Another example is Facebook popping up a memory from 2018 when we took part in a volunteering programme in India with the Jain school that we are part of. It brought back many good memories and associated with it good feelings.
What is a past experience that you savour?
Savouring the Future
I enjoy planning for the future, having events and activities scheduled in the diary to look forward to. These may be a holiday, trip away, catch-up with family/friends, visit to theatre etc. The anticipation and looking forward to generating positive emotions and good feelings as much as the actual event. An example of this is booking tickets for the Back To the Future musical months in advance of chosen visit date. Back To the Future is a classic film I grew up with so we are already onto a winner. Again looking forward to the actual day with much enthusiasm was wonderful. The musical did not disappoint; great sets, acting, humour, music and a De Lorean. It was a shared experience with my family. We created a memory that we can relish and savour in the future.
What is a future experience you can schedule to later savour?
Savouring in the Present
A key to savouring the past or the future is to be fully present in the present. To be mindful, engaged in the moment, aware and enjoy it. Some examples I have experienced are:
A few years ago I took part in a retreat where the meal at lunch time was in silence. I ate mindfully, chewing slowly, observing and enjoying each bite and chew. Savouring the taste, experience and textures.
During a full packed day with my wife visiting London we enjoyed St Paul’s Cathedral with a tour, boat trip on the Thames, lovely vegan meal, Mama Mia the Musical with a walk across Waterloo bridge at night time. Each of those moments I experienced being in the moment, enjoying it and not thinking about the experience before or coming after. This led to deeper enjoyment of each moment.
Ways to Savour
Journaling
The Happiness Journal (the 5 minute journal) we supply and use in the Happy Life Habits 30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course helps capture some savouring across the past, present and future with sections on gratitude, what would make today great and what was amazing about today.
Facebook memories
Capture memories in Facebook on your timeline and enjoy savouring when Facebook pops up the memory on it’s anniversary
Google Photos
Capture your digital photos and store them in google photos letting it pop up the memories on your phone. I enjoyed seeing memories from 14 years ago.
Create memories to savour
Book, schedule experiences and activities. Even better if you can book them with someone else to create shared memories.
Take photos / videos. My son recently turned 18. A great idea would have been to take a photo of him on each birthday and capture it in an album. Likewise for anniversaries.
Happy Life Habits events, talks, workshops and training are a great opportunity to create positive memories and emotions. The waiting list for the 30 Day Gratitude and Journal Habit Immersion Training Course is open.
We enjoy celebrating birthdays, anniversaries and World Days… see below.
Happy Life Habits us supporting World Values Day 20th October
Have a Great Day
There goes another day of your life. How did you live it?
What did you choose?
Happy Life Habits is celebrating the following upcoming World Days.
World Mindfulness Day : Monday 12th September
World Gratitude Day (Also International Day of Peace) : Wednesday 21st September
Shaileen Shah's Birthday : Monday 26th September
World Values Day : Thursday 20th October
World Kindness Day : Sunday 13th November
We hold dear Mindfulness, Gratitude, Kindness, Values and Birthdays as reminders of the things important in our life and essential for our happiness, wellbeing and a good life. An opportunity to celebrate, reflect, re-enforce and connect.
If you would like a passionate, enthusiastic, inspiring and encouraging talk or workshop on these topics during the World Day or the week the World Day falls in then look no further than Happy Life Habits. This is what we believe in and live by : Positively Impacting Happiness and Wellbeing Levels (every day)!
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day.
We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
These include the 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course and the monthly MasterMind Group sessions
Great investments that produce outstanding results - guaranteed!
The Happiness Journal used by Tim Ferris, Emma Watson and Shaileen Shah (pretty much every day for the last 6.5 years) is a great starter tool to shift your mood and develop morning routines. For a DIY option the journal is available for £27 (£30 inc p&p in UK, international please enquire. Order 2 or more journals at £25 each).
This is a perfect, unique and life changing gift that can be gifted for:
teachers at the end of the year as a thank you
Birthdays, anniversaries, weddings
graduations, new job
staff / employees
In fact it has been well received as a corporate gift by staff, clients and suppliers when given by my clients. (Enquire for bulk orders and add value workshops). A journal workshop and 30 Day gratitude & journal habit immersion training course (running for the last 2 years) are also available.
Contact Shaileen@HappyLifeHabits.co.uk for any enquiries.
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
The 7+ Highly Effective Morning Habits of a Happiness Coach
Recently I had the opportunity to contribute to a feature in the Metro on Tips for better/happier/mentally healthier mornings. I submitted my morning Happy Life Habits and was very pleased that they used a few of them. I hope you find them useful and take action to apply them. We have trained many on Gratitude and Journaling. If you need support you know who to call (Not Ghostbusters but Shaileen at Happy Life Habits!).
Recently I had the opportunity to contribute to a feature in the Metro on Tips for better/happier/mentally healthier mornings. I submitted my morning Happy Life Habits and was very pleased that they used a few of them. I hope you find them useful and take action to apply them. We have trained many on Gratitude and Journaling. If you need support you know who to call (Not Ghostbusters but Shaileen at Happy Life Habits!).
The 7+ Highly Effective Morning Habits of a Happiness Coach
Shaileen Shah a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer with Happy Life Habits loves morning routines to help kick start the day energised, focused, positive, happier and healthier. He has various daily routines that support his physical, mental, social, emotional and spiritual wellbeing - each only taking a few minutes to do before breakfast but the effects lasting throughout the day. Here they are:
Drinking water by keeping a water bottle by the bedside to rehydrate (we can dehydrate during the night) and activate the stomach
Opening the curtains and letting the morning sun into the room - helps the circadian rhythm
5 minutes of mindfulness/meditation using an app which has a few minutes of learning and then the meditation - helps develop focus, centredness and resilience (from my subscription to mindfulness.com, each month I have some 30 day trial passes I can share. Get in touch if you are interested).
A few minutes of stretching and exercise : 3 Sun Salutations (Surya Namaskar yoga), 10 press ups and 5 push ups
A short prayer - humbles and grounds
Recommit to personal mission statement - sense of purpose and meaning
An element of learning - reading a few pages from a book, listening to a podcast or going through material of a year long coaching programme he is on
Tackling a challenge, activating the brain, applying strategy by doing Wordle - a sense of accomplishment. Making the bed can give a sense of accomplishment too.
Using a Happiness Journal (which he has used for more than 7 years; now runs workshops on and trains people to develop a habit in over 30 Days) has these 3 morning activities done in 5-10mins
A daily practice of practising gratitude / counting blessings. This causes an immediate positive shift in mood, activates the learning centres in the brain and feel connected by releasing the happy chemicals dopamine and oxytocin.
Asking and answering “What would make today great?” helps focus on intentions for the day.
Reflecting on Positive Affirmations to help cultivate virtues and remind of strengths.
These habits are kept easy and quick to do so they actually get done. They prime his Mind, Body and Soul to bring his best to the day by being energised, positive, happy, healthy and focused for the challenges and opportunities that unfold.
Here is the Metro article with a great selection of tips from various coaches and experts, including me :). https://metro.co.uk/2022/06/04/27-expert-backed-tips-to-make-your-mornings-better-16757102/
2 Things you can help us with…
We are asking for your help on 2 activities for Happy Life Habits to grow and sustain positively impacting Happiness & Wellbeing Levels
(1) Help on renaming Happy Life Habits YoutTube channel
I'll be sharing some videos on YouTube which won't necessarily be immediately shared on Facebook, Instagram or LinkedIn.
Asking for a favour, if you subscribe to the Happy Life Habits YouTube Channel you will get the videos first and not miss any. Plus if we get 100 subscribers I can rename the channel from a random link name to Happy Life Habits. Really appreciate if you are able to subscribe to the YouTube channel and help us rename the link. After we have renamed, if the find the content not useful feel free to unsubscribe.
Here is the current link https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCxIVX_KsPU_1i_7GXZg1uBQ
(2) Opportunities to take part in podcasts, webinars, lives etc
If you know any podcasters please share this with them.
If you host a podcast, webinar or lives I'm currently available as a podcast guest.
I'm a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer trained in the Science of Happiness rewiring hearts and minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day.
See the poster for topics and here for past recordings of podcasts/webinars.
Been in corporate world experiencing work related stress, grief, mental health, work life balance challenges and have developed habits for positivity, happiness, resilience and productivity.
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day.
We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
These include the 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course and the monthly MasterMind Group sessions
Great investments that produce outstanding results - guaranteed!
The Happiness Journal used by Tim Ferris, Emma Watson and Shaileen Shah (pretty much every day for the last 6.5 years) is a great starter tool to shift your mood and develop morning routines. For a DIY option the journal is available for £27 (£30 inc p&p in UK, international please enquire. Order 2 or more journals at £25 each).
This is a perfect, unique and life changing gift that can be gifted for:
teachers at the end of the year as a thank you
Birthdays, anniversaries, weddings
graduations, new job
staff / employees
In fact it has been well received as a corporate gift by staff, clients and suppliers when given by my clients. (Enquire for bulk orders and add value workshops). A journal workshop and 30 Day gratitude & journal habit immersion training course (running for the last 2 years) are also available.
Contact Shaileen@HappyLifeHabits.co.uk for any enquiries.
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
What strategies do you use to keep calm through challenging situations?
On the Happy Life Habits Community Facebook Group we regularly share quotes, reflective / thought provoking questions, articles and events. We recently asked “What strategies do you use to keep calm through challenging situations?” and have a good response to it.
May prove to be useful this month as students get their “A” Level and “GCSE” results.
On the Happy Life Habits Community Facebook Group we regularly share quotes, reflective / thought provoking questions, articles and events. The below we asked recently and have a good response to it.
May prove to be useful this month as students get their “A” Level and “GCSE” results.
My friend Deepa shared a whole series of useful ideas many of which resonate with the Self care ideas we have shared in the past:
Wow, so many strategies to help re-set:
1. Movement - walk, workout, trampoline, yogasanas, garba!
2. Sing - usually devotional music, raises my vibrational frequency!
3. Talk to friends, seek guidance, especially if it's new challenges.
4. Rest, give my nervous system a chance to feel, heal. Guided yoga nidra is great.
5. Go out into nature, tap into the natural healing components of the sun, the greenery, water, earth, air.
6. Listen to relevant podcasts/clips which help inform so can take the next steps with more awareness.
7. Just be, take time to pause, to just be. It's not as easy if the mind is on overdrive. But needs to be trained, cultivated so that you have access to do this.
8. Give myself a chance to process the heightened emotions. Often in times of stillness, usually first thing in the morning or last thing at night - poetry comes out! Sometimes in the middle of the night too, when I wake up! (Journalling and gratitude also effective)
9. Continuous practice of meditation and prayer. So much inner power there.
10. Connect - find what works best for you to connect back to your real truth/soul centre, any of the above may help.
11. Sometimes watching funny shows, just gives you a light-hearted needed distraction!
12. Pranic healing.
13. Reminding myself of certain quotes, eg 'life happens for us not to us'. For our growth and evolution.
Oh I should write, I do a lot of venting out too I find that helpful, rather than bottling up.
Oh and also crying if your system allows, so healthy and releasing.
2 Things you can help us with…
We are asking for your help on 2 activities for Happy Life Habits to grow and sustain positively impacting Happiness & Wellbeing Levels
(1) Help on renaming Happy Life Habits YoutTube channel
I'll be sharing some videos on YouTube which won't necessarily be immediately shared on Facebook, Instagram or LinkedIn.
Asking for a favour, if you subscribe to the Happy Life Habits YouTube Channel you will get the videos first and not miss any. Plus if we get 100 subscribers I can rename the channel from a random link name to Happy Life Habits. Really appreciate if you are able to subscribe to the YouTube channel and help us rename the link. After we have renamed, if the find the content not useful feel free to unsubscribe.
Here is the current link https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCxIVX_KsPU_1i_7GXZg1uBQ
(2) Opportunities to take part in podcasts, webinars, lives etc
If you know any podcasters please share this with them.
If you host a podcast, webinar or lives I'm currently available as a podcast guest.
I'm a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer trained in the Science of Happiness rewiring hearts and minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day.
See the poster for topics and here for past recordings of podcasts/webinars.
Been in corporate world experiencing work related stress, grief, mental health, work life balance challenges and have developed habits for positivity, happiness, resilience and productivity.
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day.
We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
These include the 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course and the monthly MasterMind Group sessions
Great investments that produce outstanding results - guaranteed!
The Happiness Journal used by Tim Ferris, Emma Watson and Shaileen Shah (pretty much every day for the last 6.5 years) is a great starter tool to shift your mood and develop morning routines. For a DIY option the journal is available for £27 (£30 inc p&p in UK, international please enquire. Order 2 or more journals at £25 each).
This is a perfect, unique and life changing gift that can be gifted for:
teachers at the end of the year as a thank you
Birthdays, anniversaries, weddings
graduations, new job
staff / employees
In fact it has been well received as a corporate gift by staff, clients and suppliers when given by my clients. (Enquire for bulk orders and add value workshops). A journal workshop and 30 Day gratitude & journal habit immersion training course (running for the last 2 years) are also available.
Contact Shaileen@HappyLifeHabits.co.uk for any enquiries.
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW) 2022 Theme Loneliness
Resources to support Mental Health Awareness Week : Theme Loneliness include articles, videos and events.
Prassannachandra story from Jain Faith
Mental Health can manifest as physical issues
Mental Health Awareness Week 9 -15 May 2022 : Theme Loneliness
Articles, videos, events, resources
Mental Health can and will impact everyone of us in some way : directly or indirectly. The better aware we are the better we can respond. The below video is a Jain faith story being used here to highlight how a person may appear externally does not reflect what is going on internally. The image below it (shared to me by Nisanka Wickramarachchi) shares some of the physical issues that manifest due to mental health. At Happy Life Habits we share that health, happiness and the human being are based on 4 main inter- related dimensions: Physical, Mental, Social/Emotional and Spiritual. An impact in any one has a knock on effect on others. A 4 are very much connected.
Mental Health can manifest as physical issues (image by Mellow Doodles).
Mental Health Awareness Week 9 -15 May 2022 : Theme Loneliness
Happy Life Habits (HLH) is again supporting Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW). This year The Mental Health Foundation has chosen the theme of Loneliness. This theme is a very important to me personally, I’ve written about it many a time and we strive to create Happy Life Habit events to have a sense of community, connection, interaction and belonging to help avoid loneliness.
Am I alone in thinking; actually; in believing that loneliness need not exist. We have the power in our choices of thought, speech, action to increase a bit more kindness, compassion, love, forgiveness, friendliness, mindfulness and gratitude in our interactions; to mean no one need ever feel alone. We are social animals and expressing these virtues lead to pro-social behaviours; a sense of connection and community.
- Shaileen Shah
This article from the Mental Health Foundation explains why the theme of loneliness. It shares:
Loneliness is the feeling we experience when there is a mismatch between the social connections we have and those that we need or want.
It found that the warmth of our relationships throughout life had the greatest impact on our life satisfaction and health.
During the lockdowns, we found that loneliness was almost 3 times that of pre-pandemic levels.
The Paradox is you are not alone in feeling alone.
When have you experienced Mental Health Challenges or loneliness? How did you feel? What did you do? What Helped?
I've felt lonely or experience Mental Health challenges:
1st week and 1st year at University - had no immediate like minded friend circle.
During the Summer when finishing an MSc. - Most of the other students had left the city.
In my first job during my twenties for a US consultancy when I was posted in the US for a few weeks/months - first and only birthday and Diwali on my own without family or friends.
When on honeymoon in the Maldives and better half needed an emergency operation. In a time when mobiles did not readily exist, international calls were expensive; we needed to deal with this on our own.
At work when there was after work drinks at pub, being a non-drinker and introverted I felt out of place.
When I suffered work related stress - felt could not talk to anyone.
At the start of the pandemic - see Together in Isolation article.
I felt disconnected, on my own, low, no drive.
Here are some snippets and links (click title) to Happy Life Habits articles on Mental Health, Connection, Loneliness etc. Plus one from The Charity Mind.
Together in Isolation
The communities that I am a part of; being for me a source of faith, learning, growth, health, service and social activity were all stopping events and activity - badminton clubs, youth clubs, Jain Faith School, Jain Faith Convention, meditation circles, etc. This was impacting my sense of connection, community, clarity and meaning.
— Shaileen Shah - Together in Isolation
The Ups and Downs of a Happiness Coach
During this pandemic I have been craving for connection both people to people and grateful for the technology connections, I guess with the previous articles on Happier Relationships and what I have learnt over time I understand the importance of this to our happiness, well being and mental health. I have also been through the turbulence of insecurities and validation issues.
Houston we have a problem : we’ve lost connection
Imagine if I was not in good Mental Health and maybe even Suicidal what could have happened if that one email did not come through? I know from website statistics that more than one person had read the article. The picture on the article of me sitting on a chair , on a cliff edge looking out and contemplating could have turned into standing up and taking a few steps to the cliff edge and then a few more steps…
What do we all have in common? Community
Happy Life Habits (HLH) has been working hard to serve and cultivate a community of people who want to positively impact happiness and well-being levels. When we are happy, kind, optimistic or hopeful by contagion the people around us also feel that. An act of kindness done to one person ripples out to 6 others and then with each of those 6 rippling to another 6 for three further levels.
No man is an island
They remind us we do not achieve things on our own (poem), that what/who we are surrounded by (our community, environment) has an impact on us (corn story) and we have an impact on others; and finally that real wealth, happiness and life satisfaction is in being kind, giving and making a difference to others.
The Charity Mind Resources on Loneliness
Explains loneliness, including the causes of loneliness and how it relates to mental health problems. Gives practical tips to help manage feelings of loneliness, and other places you can go for support.
Feeling lonely isn't in itself a mental health problem, but the two are strongly linked. Having a mental health problem can increase your chance of feeling lonely.
Here are a set of curated videos on the theme of loneliness and how to deal with it.
We are partnering with some groups, organisations and individuals to support in terms of awareness, community and connection. These are : Mind In Enfield and Barnet, Young Jains, Oshwal Connect, Manish Gohel (Asian Parents Club, Business Club) , Reshna Shah, Aarti O Gosrani (Oshwal Connect), Sonal Dave, Priya Shah, Hansa Pankhania and Martine Drake (Mind In Enfield and Barnet) . We ae also very grateful to Shandip Shah from Balance Consultancy in providing sponsorship for this project.
https://www.oshwalconnect.org/
Daily Evening sessions (will be recorded) with guest speakers followed by activity to foster connection & community.
Sessions on
Panel discussion on Community & Connection
The charity Mind in Enfield & Barnet sharing on Mental Health and Loneliness
How to overcome Loneliness
Stress & Anxiety in the Workplace
Suicide Prevention
See the posters below or events page for more details.
Day 1
Recordings of sessions
Here are a set of short, useful videos that Happy Life Habits has created on Mental Health drawing on my own experience of Mental Health. They share some stories, concepts, quotes and actions for you to take.
Introduction
What is Mental Health?
Impact of Stress
Thinking
Worry
Loneliness & Depression
Happy Life Habits
These all help our well being
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
What are your strengths and why be aware of them?
What are your strengths and why be aware of them?
What am I doing here?
I hated every minute, every moment.
Patience is a virtue…
Marketing is about Values says Steve Jobs
Last 100 Days or so plus next 100 Days or so
Mental Health Awareness Week 9 -15 May 2022 : Theme Loneliness
Pay it Forward Fund
What am I doing here?
I hated every minute, every moment. “What am I doing here?” I asked myself many a time. I was unhappy, frustrated, annoyed and unproductive. Losing company loyalty fast. Working late again on a task which I was ill equipped for. Not having the correct skills, knowledge or support. One that was not really part of my role or responsibilities. I was caught in the cross fire of stupid office politics between 2 departments; my department : Technology and the other department : Business Change. I was a technical lead on the project, that meant I’m a coder, designer, integrator not a business specification writer. However here I was sat at a desk in business change trying to write business specifications for the first and last time in my life. Hating every minute, every moment. Some additional back story context, the bank I had worked for had been bailed out in the financial crisis of 2008, yes that bank. It had spent silly amounts on a takeover of another bank, now I was in a changing culture, uncertain future, with managers who did not really know me, on a project from hell.
This was because I was not working from my strengths. In fact far from it.
These days when I work from my strengths I am in good flow mode, creative, productive, engaging, happy, on fire and on purpose. For an example of that, have a listen to recent podcasts/talks. Most recent is the Woo Woo Wednesday Show Podcast where we covered a lot of ground from gratitude, grief, science of happiness to Tony Robbins Firewalk Seminar and Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. I was asked to share an overview of the 7 Habits - this was not pre-planned, it was spontaneous. Fortunately the habits have been a big part of my development so I was able to share my view and insights enthusiastically. I loved every minute, every moment. I was feeling energetic, connected and congruent. I was living from my strengths.
What are your strengths and why be aware of them?
Character Strengths are the positive parts of your personality that impact how you think, feel and behave.
Knowing and applying your highest character strengths is the key to you being your best self.
Character strengths are the core personality traits that define your unique identity and make you feel authentic, alive and engaged in life.
Research shows learning about your strengths and how to express them can make you happier, less stressed, more productive at work and better connected to others.
From VIA Institute on Character
As I continue learning and exploring I am regularly reminded of virtues and character strengths. These have been a core part of my spiritual development, personal development, happiness & wellbeing. In fact the initial version of the Gratitude Workshop was born more that 7 years ago at a Young Jains Virtue Lab where we explored and practiced virtues such as gratitude, forgiveness, humility and compassion. There are 4 foundation qualities recommended to nurture and cultivate for our spiritual journey. I’ll share two of them here, The first being ‘Maitri’ , universal friendliness, unconditional love and I akin it to the Buddhist concept of Metta, Loving Kindness. More on this in next blog dedicated to Mental Health Awareness Week which is on the theme of Loneliness. Another is ‘Pramod’ , recognising and appreciating the good qualities in others. This for me is an expression of gratitude and we fully experience this in the 30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course when we do a powerful Gratitude Letter exercise.
Current coaching program and courses I have done re-iterate knowing our core virtues /strengths and living/expressing them.
I have been taking the VIA (Virtues In Action) character strengths test for the last few years. I encouraged our Master Mind Group members take the test in 2021 and we learnt more about them in the course on Happiness and Health we were doing together. Interestingly MY TOP 5 (from the list of 24 split over 6 categories : WISDOM,COURAGE, HUMANITY, JUSTICE, TEMPERANCE, TRANSCENDENCE) have been fairly consistent last few years though order does change. Here they are for March 2022.
This is great as it fits hand in glove with what Happy Life Habits is about:
HAPPY LIFE HABITS = PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT + THE SCIENCE OF HAPPINESS + SPIRITUALITY
The 30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course expresses all 5 virtues. The Master Mind Group has learning as a core component. The community talks and free events / talks are acts of kindness and spirituality.
If you would like to find out your character strengths then you can take the free short survey by clicking here VIA Character Strengths Survey or finding the survey at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Patience is a virtue…
I have enjoyed the very visual posts shared by Janis Ozolins recently on LinkedIn.
This one, in relation to patience, struck a chord. I am all of the roles shown in the image. Being a parent definitely needs patience.
I suggested another one right next to parent and of same height or taller is "carer for your parent".
I suggested another one right next to parent and of same height or taller is "carer for your parent".
The last 15 months or so I have needed to cultivate my patience as I become one of the main carers for my elder mum (80+) who was widowed 15 months ago and suffers from both Parkinson's and Dementia.
Sometimes I have lost my patience but the lesson and opportunity comes again and again.
As they say Patience is a virtue and I'm all for developing and expressing virtues.
Marketing is about Values says Steve Jobs
A brilliant example of focus on strengths, virtues/values as well as conviction to a vision and sense of purpose. Watch the whole 15 minute video introducing the Think Different campaign for Apple - it is a master class, so inspiring and in hindsight what awesome foresight.
Last 100 Days or so plus next 100 Days or so
Here are some of the activities and events we have delivered and will be delivering. They include the Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course, Master Mind Group sessions, Gratitude & Journal Workshop for Mind In Enfield and Barnet, Kids Happiness Booster sessions, Happier Relationships, Positive Grief talk for the Lohana Community of North London, Stress & Mental Health at Better plus just last month the Happiness Festival with over a dozen speakers to celebrate International Day of Happiness.
Mental Health Awareness Week 9 -15 May 2022 : Theme Loneliness
Happy Life Habits (HLH) is again supporting Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW). This year the theme is Loneliness.
The Paradox is you are not alone in feeling alone.
When have you experienced Mental Health Challenges or loneliness? How did you feel? What did you do? What Helped?
I've felt lonely or experience Mental Health challenges (stress) :
1st week and 1st year at University
During the Summer when finishing an MSc.
In my first job during my twenties for a US consultancy when I was posted in the US for a few weeks/months - first and only birthday and Diwali on my own without family or friends
When on honeymoon in the Maldives and better half needed an emergency operation
At work when there was after work drinks at pub, being a non-drinker and introverted I felt out of place.
When I suffered work related stress
At the start of the pandemic
I felt disconnected, on my own, low, no drive.
Anyone else experienced Mental Health Challenges or loneliness and are happy to share?
_____________________________________________________
We are partnering with some groups, organisations and individuals to support in terms of awareness, community and connection. These are : Mind In Enfield and Barnet, Young Jains, Oshwal Connect, Manish Gohel (Asian Parents Club, Business Club) , Reshna Shah, Aarti O Gosrani (Oshwal Connect), Sonal Dave, Priya Shah, Hansa Pankhania and Martine Drake (Mind In Enfield and Barnet) . We ae also very grateful to Shandip Shah from Balance Consultancy in providing sponsorship for this project.
Daily Evening sessions (will be recorded) with guest speakers followed by activity to foster connection & community.
Sessions on
Panel discussion on Community & Connection
The charity Mind in Enfield & Barnet sharing on Mental Health and Loneliness
How to overcome Loneliness
Stress & Anxiety in the Workplace
Suicide Prevention
See the posters below or events page for more details.
The next blog will be fully related to Mental Health Awareness week and the theme of loneliness. Be sure to sign up for the newsletter to get it in you inbox and not miss it.
Register Now for life changing, happiness inducing events
Register Now for life changing, happiness inducing events
What an opportunity and uplifting experience. Thank you Shaileen Shah, at ‘happy life habits’.
I truly appreciate every session (and all the encouragement and support, connection and sharing in the group, and between sessions), and your incredible commitment to making it such a enriching experience.
There are so many benefits from this experience. It has opened my eyes and shown me how much more intentionally and enjoyably I can be living. I highly recommend engaging with Happy life habits.
Mary Thomson. NHS Public Governor, nurse and educator._________________________________________________________________________
Joining the Mastermind Group enabled me to be among like-minded people who all wanted to learn new things and improve their lifestyle. I enjoyed the discussions which were inspiring and uplifting. I found everyone in the group non-judgemental and genuinely interested in helping and supporting each other. Personally, they helped me resolve a difficult challenge by suggesting a few different solutions.Pragna, Carer
_______________________________________________________________________
In 2021 I joined the Mastermind group where it enhanced my own personal development and learnt some techniques to optimise my learning and energy which were put in practise as well. We also had to choose a book to the relevant topic and discuss what we grasped from it.
It's all about exchanging themes and ideas to suit your own pace and being with like minded people who want to make a change for themselves in a positive way!
This has definitely made me utilise my time in an efficient way and see what my priorities are and bringing about awareness.
Thank you Shaileen for bringing colours to all the members and touching the lives of many friends!
See the change in you as you bring happiness to yourself and others!
Reshna Shah
Finance Manager
Pay it Forward Fund
A sponsored or part sponsored space on the excellent, life changing, mind shifting 30 Day Happy Life Habits Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course (worth £135+).
As a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer I have experienced Mental Health challenges such as stress, grief, loneliness, etc. One of the practices that science says and certainly has been my experience for better mental and emotional wellbeing is the practice of gratitude and journaling.
That is why during the start of the pandemic in 2020 we launched the 30 Day training course that has positively impacted many. There are many benefits that I can't list here but refer you to the dedicated web page for the course.
Through some generous seed funding from my old badminton club, Sonal Dave and others who see the benefits of the work we do have a small Pay It Forward fund.
If you or you know someone who may benefit from the Training Course but at the current moment are not able to due to financial reasons then the Pay It Forward Fund can help. As the name says Pay It Forward is someone having paid before to allow this opportunity. If you do take up the Pay It Forward funding we hope that when circumstances change for you that you are able to help Pay It Forward for someone else.
On registration form in the referral code put "Pay It Forward Fund" if you want to request use of the fund.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Sometimes it’s just Mission Impossible
Sometimes it feels like Mission Impossible with the projects and activities we have ongoing with Happy Life Habits at the moment (most are this month!) however the Life in 3 Acts sums up Happy Life Habits’ approach. This is what we have been up to or have on the near horizon.
The Self Care Infographic has been well received and shared. It has help my business clients connect with their clients including past clients.
Kids Happiness Boosters for Half Term (completely new)
Gratitude Journaling for Happiness Workshop with Mind In Enfield and Barnet
30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course
Happier Relationships with Happy Life Habits
HLH International Day of Happiness Global Virtual Festival
Master Mind Group focus on Learning
Initial discussions regarding HLH taking part in podcasts or speaking at community groups and companies
ONE FOR THE KIDS, ONE FOR THE ADULTS (FREE) AND ONE FOR EVERYONE (FREE)
Happy Life Habits have got
(1) Half term Happiness Booster sessions arranged for kids
(2) Happier Relationships workshop for adults - Free tickets available now (limited number)
(3) Global Virtual Happiness Festival - for all - pre-launch early bird free tickets available now (limited numbers).
We have session suggestions from authors, coaches, trainers, speakers, comedians, chocolatiers etc that are being reviewed such as:
Nothing Links Like Laughter
Healthy Lifestyle = Happy You
Chocolate for a happier life
Mindfulness / Meditation for younger children
Center of Happiness
Like a Comedian
What's self care to you?
How to be kind to yourself when the world hasn’t been kind to you
If you would like to share/present/run session or have stall at the Festival there are currently opportunities to get involved
Sometimes it feels like Mission Impossible with the projects and activities we have ongoing with Happy Life Habits at the moment (most are this month!) however the Life in 3 Acts sums up Happy Life Habits’ approach. This is what we have been up to or have on the near horizon.
The Self Care Infographic has been well received and shared. It has help my business clients connect with their clients including past clients.
Kids Happiness Boosters for Half Term (completely new)
Gratitude Journaling for Happiness Workshop with Mind In Enfield and Barnet
30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course
Happier Relationships with Happy Life Habits
HLH International Day of Happiness Global Virtual Festival
Master Mind Group focus on Learning
Initial discussions regarding HLH taking part in podcasts or speaking at community groups and companies
All of these involve a fair bit such as:
What we are doing and Why
Research
Posters /Graphics for the event
Setting up/sharing HLH Activities on Eventbrite, Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, HLH Website, WhatsApp, Blog, Emails
Booking forms
Conversations with various parties and collaborators
Learning various platforms
I’m loving it, learning, growing, connecting, collaborating and impacting.
Sometimes it’s going to have to be Mission Impossible
Image from https://www.imdb.com/
I was only going to watch 10 minutes of the film Mission Impossible, again, having watched it many times before during the last 25+ years, it still entertains.
An hour and half later the film ended and I felt good. I felt good because the film has fast moving action, gadgets, plot twists, cool music score all keeping the brain engaged as the good guy wins.
Tom Cruise’s character Ethan Hunt shows resilience, confidence, resourcefulness, creativity and attention to detail to name but a few.
It has some iconic memorable scenes like Tom Cruise’s character catching the bead of sweat from falling onto the floor which has sensors to trigger alarm if pressure changes, the accessing of the CIA computer while dangling from the ceiling and the helicopter tied to the Eurostar train as it goes into a tunnel.
Which film(s) do you watch for 10 minutes again then end up enjoying the whole film again and what do you like about the film?
Kids Happiness Boosters for Half Term (completely new)
I really believe if we can introduce positive habits to children early on then they can develop and use coping tools for the rest of their life.
To find out more or book click here
Gratitude
We continue sharing and making a difference with the Gratitude Journaling for Happiness Workshop with Mind In Enfield and Barnet.
The January 30 Day Gratitude and Journal Habit Immersion Training course has just ended. Lovely sharing and feedback during the month and on the celebration call as trainees shared their experience and transforming shifts. Each iteration of the course has unique elements and new ideas introduced.
Our guest speakers those who had done the course previously shared the impact of the course on them. Terence shared how it helps him cope with depression with medication and the positive impact it has given him. The course brings so many positive elements.
Next course dates are 1st May.
Here is a guest speaker testimonial. Next blog will have another one.
Priti Shah - Debt Solution Specialist : Regional Director at Lightside Financial
Build Resilience and Mental Strength for the future
Resources that will help now, every single day and for the future for the rest of life
Benefiting from: Positive intentions
Setting the day up well
Think in detailed/ granular way
Feel happier from the morning
Discipline and Habit to do every day
Happier Relationships
Good healthy relationships are shown to lead to long, happy, healthy lives. February being the month of Valentines we have an event on Happier Relationships
It is for singles, couples, friend, groups, You!
It will be a mix of sharing some information, interactive discussions and fun games on the exciting Wonder platform. Come alone or bring a friend or few.
Master Mind Group (MMG)
The MMG had a bonus kick off meeting in January where we shared the focus for February meeting to be on Learning. Using our chosen platform at self pace we are learning how to learn effectively When we meet in the month each member will share key ideas from a book they have chosen on the platform as well as how they are applying the ideas. Examples of the books are: Limitless, Make it Stick, How to be a straight A student, Mindset, Flow, Deep Work etc.
I’m very much enjoying the learning process and look forward to enhancing my knowledge with the group sharing.
Happy Life Habits International Day of Happiness Global Virtual Festival 19th March
Imagine a Happiness Festival a bit like the Ideal Home exhibition with different themed zones, show stages with scheduled events and individual stalls. Multiple sessions running at the same time. Various Zones such as Laughter, Relaxation, Movement, Creativeness, Science of Happiness
The pre-launch free tickets are available for booking now.
For the last few years Happy Life Habits (HLH) has hosted and served during the UN’s International Day of Happiness (IDOH): 20th March and Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW) :May.
In 2022 we are continuing this with an International Day of Happiness Virtual Festival on Sat 19th March 2022 (1 day before IDOH)
ARE YOU INTERESTED TO BE A BIGGER PART OF IT?
THE OPTIONS ARE:
Share a session for 15mins - 60mins
Share a session and also have a stall
Be a sponsor
For further info on any of these.
We have session suggestions from authors, coaches, trainers, speakers, comedians, chocolatiers etc that are being reviewed such as:
Nothing Links Like Laughter
Interactive chat about what makes us laugh. The what, why, and how to make it happen. Appreciating how it positively affects every aspect of communication, whether spoken or written, whether for pleasure or business.
Healthy Lifestyle = Happy You
We often think that when we'll be successful, fit and settled, we'll be happy. In this session we'll discuss the steps everyone can take to become more confident, energised and healthy and just be the best and happiest version of yourself. You'll get clear and easy actions that you can implement straight away and will give you a sense of achievement to help you take back control of what you think, eat and do so as to releasing the real you!
Chocolate for a happier life
An introduction to chocolate appreciation
From an OBE awarded chocolatier with over 30 years experience
Mindfulness / Meditation for younger children
Mindfulness activities and book reading
Center of Happiness
You can spend your whole life searching for happiness. Once you discover the center of happiness, your search ends and you truly start living a happy life. Learn what is that center and how can you connect with it.
Like a Comedian
There is a lot we can all learn from the approach we comedians take to our work. I'm not just talking about laughter, although that is invaluable. Our approach to creativity, our willingness to try out imperfect material in public, our connection with our audience. I will give people some tools to help free them from some of the stresses they encounter, especially in their working lives, based on the comedian's craft.
What's self care to you?
Self Care session - to provide an overview of what self care can be for you. An opportunity to consider the eight components of self care
How to be kind to yourself when the world hasn’t been kind to you
People will take away simple tools to help themselves when they feel negative emotions. These are simple and powerful and gives an immediate release whilst building our ability to accept our emotions.
These are some, others include book readings for children, financial wellbeing for kids, breathwork etc.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Self Care for Blue Monday
The 3rd Monday in January is known as Blue Monday when many people feel at their lowest, depressed and unhappy.
This is supposedly due to some factors occurring at a similar time which include Christmas being a fading memory, payday still a week away, January bills coming through, rest of the year still to go through, high hoped resolutions broken, cold, gloomy weather, pandemics, working in office/ from home, world crisis’ and such factors.
Monday Blues on Blue Monday
The 3rd Monday in January is known as Blue Monday when many people feel at their lowest, depressed and unhappy.
This is supposedly due to some factors occurring at a similar time which include Christmas being a fading memory, payday still a week away, January bills coming through, rest of the year still to go through, high hoped resolutions broken, cold, gloomy weather, pandemics, working in office/ from home, world crisis’ and such factors.
Ways to combat Blue Monday…
Seeing the beauty of nature ( I saw a gaggle of geese fly in V formation overhead)
Write down 3 things that your are grateful for
Take a moment to enjoy mindfulness and focus on your breathing, do a short body scan, a mindful walk or mindful eating
Read and share an inspiring quote e.g “Every day may not be a good day, but there is good in every day”
Tell a joke
Laugh out loud for no reason
Call a friend, have chat
Get together for a coffee or meal with a friend or family member
Happy Life Habits has created this useful Self Care infographic to help remind of self care practises for Blue Monday, working from home or working in the office and remind them that you are there for them.
You can share this with :
Employees
Clients
Customers
Suppliers
Prospective clients
Family and friends
By distributing via
Email
Website
WhatsApp/Messenger/Facebook
Intranet
Newsletter
Printing and putting on desks or office walls
To order an infographic with your logo and website : email us. Many thanks to the various companies/individuals who have ordered an infographic supporting the work we do.
The Self Care Infographic is based on material from this article Together in Isolation.
Click image to download a printable version
Future events being planned - opportunity to be involved
Last year we hosted a International Day of Happiness event in March using the Wonder platform and having multiple workshops happening at the same time. This year we are planning something similar for International Day of Happiness in March and for Mental Health Awareness in May.
If you would like to have a “stall” and host a workshop or talk or two then get in touch. It could be linked the self care infographic such as laughter workshop, Stress/Anxiety talk, yoga, meditation, confidence, self esteem, tapping, visioning, mindfulness, breathwork, tai chi, qui gong, art, poetry or such like. Ideally it needs to be positive, add value, sharing knowledge and practice.
All current events are in the events page
Company and Corporate Opportunities
We have a range of offerings for small, medium, large companies and corporates including talks, workshops, training and infographics that help with productivity, resilience, resourcefulness, positivity and mental wellbeing.
Get in touch if you think it would be of interest to your workplace for teams, network groups, well being programmes etc.
Feel Good Friday (Financial Wellbeing and consistent good money habits are good for our happiness)
I've learnt from studying the science of happiness that acts of kindness are good for us. We should do them regularly (even daily). One study additionally found that now and them by stacking acts of kindness together in a time slot such as a few hours or a particular day give a more longer lasting feel good factor then one a day.
Today I had the pleasure of stacking some acts of kindness together and getting this boost when I delivered books I had to local primary schools.
Recently my friend Will Rainey author of Grandpa's Fortune Fables ran a competition in which I won 5 copies of his book. 1 for me and 4 to give to a local primary school. I asked If instead I could give split the copies to give to 4 primary schools and Will happily obliged.
The 4 chosen schools are:
Dollis Primary School - My Primary
Whitchurch First School - where a friend works and where I did my first happiness / gratitude workshop for schools
Krishna Avanti Primary School, Harrow ( part of Avanti Schools Trust) - the first state-funded Hindu faith school in the United Kingdom (my son is at the secondary)
Millbrook Park School- a Church of England school where my nephew attends.
Here is a short note for the schools which Will wrote.
______________________________________________
Letter from the author of Grandpa’s Fortune Fables:
I wrote Grandpa's Fortune Fables to help children learn about money in a way which is fun and memorable. I strongly believe that children who learn about money grow up more confident, have higher self-esteem and less money worries as adults.
Learning about money shouldn't be boring and hence why I put the important lessons into fables. I still remember learning from Aesop's fables as they were read during the headmaster's assembly when I was at school many years ago.
Grandpa's Fortune Fables covers different money topics so that children learn to earn, save and grow their money whilst avoiding debt, scams and gambling. Empowering every child, regardless of their background, to take control of their financial future.
To help teachers (and parents), there is a discussion point, at the end of each chapter, to start a conversation with children about what they have just heard or read.
I hope you believe this book will be a great resource to the school.
If you would like to order more copies of the book, I am more than happy to arrange a discount for your school. Please contact me at will@bluetreesavings.com.
Enjoy!
Will
30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training course
The January course has started well and we have incorporated some new improvements to the course including new content for the habits section of the Journal Workshop.
Waiting list is open for future training. Upon request we can do dedicated training for small teams, groups, family and friends.
One of the benefits shared from the course
The Gratitude Journaling for Happiness workshops with Mind in Enfield and Barnet are free and scheduled for February and March. See events page for details.
Last chance to join the MMG 2022
We have a bonus kick off meeting on Wednesday 19th January, last chance to join the MMG
Take a moment to reflect on the last year. Also look forward to where you want to be, what you want to have experienced and learnt by this time next year. Take control and supercharge your development in 2022 so when you look back you have grown and developed from where you are now. MasterMind Group is open for registration, you can register here
Here are some free opportunities shared to the MMG members that may interest you for your learning, development and growth, I will incorporate learning from them in HLH activities and the What I Learnt Today page :
What I learned today… #WhatILearnedToday
Learning, education and growth is important to me, helps us be happy, reduces chances of various ailments in older age As the year goes by I am collating some of my learnings and sharing here. Updates will be on an adhoc basis maybe weekly, maybe monthly, maybe longer. Some are posted on Social Media and they are collated here.
Looking Back, Looking Forward workshop attendees, now is a good time to review what you captured in the workbook and to do so on a regularly basis.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
I GOT HIGH ON GRASS, WEED AND POT
It’s been tough times with many challenges, stresses and emotions to deal with. Some dealt with and some not so well. To help I have turned to grass, weed and pot. Here I share some of those experiences, insights and learning.
I GOT HIGH ON GRASS, WEED & POT
It’s been tough times with many challenges, stresses and emotions to deal with. Some dealt with well and some not so well. To help I have turned to grass, weed and pot. Here I share some of those experiences, insights and learning.
I am not talking about getting high on grass, weed or pot in the sense of drugs but about positive emotions from gardening and nature.
Grass
The grass is greener where you water it
Neil Barringham.
During Spring I took out the lawnmower and cut the lawn. Then many weeks passed and the grass grew and grew. Once again I took out the less than 1 year old lawnmower, set it to the lower setting to cut the grass very short and started to mow the lawn. The lawnmower was hard to push, struggled and did not make a lot of headway. Then it stopped working. Could it be the fuse, the socket, the extension lead, the lawnmower? I checked the lawnmower cord into the extension lead, that was fine. I checked the extension lead into the wall socket and that it was switched on - that was fine too. I plugged in another device in the wall socket to confirm socket was fine, did the same with the extension lead. They were all fine, so by process of elimination the problem was with the lawnmower or its cord/plug. Changing the fuse made no difference. Was the lawnmower still in warranty? Was it going to cost a fortune to solve?
I unplugged the lawnmower, turned it upside down and checked the blades etc. The long grass had got entwined around the blade spinner (hover mover) and stopped it from spinning. Slowly I removed all the strands that were wrapped around, plugged in the mower, and started it. The joyous sound of a whirling blade was heard. A few weeks later I cut the grass again on mid height setting and also used strimmer. So what were the lessons learned?
Lessons learned
If you try to cut too long a grass with too low a setting it won’t work. You have to tackle the challenge with the right setting. To be effective, the ability to produce and the capability of producing need to be on par. Too big a challenge without the correct ability will lead to failure.
When you have a big problem, break the problem down into smaller chunks and tackle each one to identify where the actual problem is.
Once you identify the problem establish if you can fix it yourself or need expert help
For maintaining a good lawn or anything else it requires regular attention /cutting/ routines at the appropriate frequency be that daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly or yearly.
Know which tool to use for which problem. If the only tool in your tool box is a hammer all your problems will look like nails. Use correct tools for the correct job, using the strimmer or hand shears to cut the long grass may not be the best approach. Using a spade would be the wrong tool for the job.
Stephen Covey 7th Habit : Sharpen the Saw - keep the saw sharp to do the job. Keep learning, investing and developing yourself.
Establishing, investigating and resolving the problem myself gave a satisfaction and affirmed my growth mindset and provided an entry for my happiness journal - I could have got a gardener to do the job. Where and when appropriate I get the correct help involved.
What is needed for Growth (Pot)?
What is needed for Growth?
.
When I Google to see what is need for growth, in particular plant growth the results shown vary from 4 to 7 things. The four things are best described with this acronym: LAWN
L = Light - Sunlight
A = Air - Carbon dioxide
W = Water - H20
N = Nutrients - Soil etc
The magic of photosynthesis in plants takes water (Carbon dioxide) + Water + Energy from light to transform it; using Chlorophyll; into food (glucose) and oxygen.
The additional items are : The right temperature, room to grow (space) and time - it is not overnight.
Similarly for our growth we need the right environment (air to breathe, water to hydrate, food for nutrients, people, etc), goals to grow towards (sunlight), space to grow - not be constrained or limited by our thinking, beliefs, fears and time. We often also need a catalyst like the Chlorophyll to create that growth transformation - this may be internal or external.
What makes the plant strong and build resilience is exposure to challenge - rain, wind, sun, insects, etc. Similarly challenge helps us grow and develop resilience. The plant if in a pot needs to be in the right size of the pot, as it outgrows the pot it should be re-potted into a bigger pot so it has space to grow. Likewise we need to move out of our comfort zone into a slightly bigger zone, grow and keep going. If we try to move out too far too fast, similar to a seedling being put into a very large pot it will struggle.
Strong, deep roots are needed.
Here is an interesting video shared by KarmaTube about how trees talk to each other thought their roots.
Gardening & Community Gardens
We might think we are nurturing our garden, but of course it’s our garden that is really nurturing us” -Jenny Uglow
Many thanks to Devi for sharing the above quote in the Happy Life Habits Community Facebook Group.
Being in nature and gardening have many beneficial effects. Some I have experienced when gardening, tree planting, working in a community garden or being in nature are relate to the happiness/health dimensions of Physical, Mental, Social/Emotional and Spiritual :
Connection
Community
Mindfulness, Present moment awareness
Focus, Distance from our troubles
Relaxation, Therapeutic
Nurturing growth
Working with our hands
Vitamin D
Noticing smells, the air and watching the wildlife
Reminded of what we sow is what we reap
Pruning - get rid of habits, beliefs and things that don’t serve us to allow space for those that do
The greenness and expanse of nature has a calming and awe inspiring effect. The colour green is relaxing hence in TV studios they have the green room used before people go on air. This article shares the benefits of gardening and being in greenery.
Martine Drake from Mind in Enfield & Barnet took part in the Happy Life Habits 30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course. She runs a community garden and has this to share:
Results suggest that community gardens were perceived by gardeners to provide numerous health benefits, including improved access to food, improved nutrition, increased physical activity and improved mental health. Community gardens were also seen to promote social health and community cohesion.
From my experiences running the garden for Mind in Enfield and Barnet, we have seen increased physical activity (including from walking to and from the site) and improved mental health mainly from being with other people in an attractive environment.
Weed
Weeds take no effort to grow and they grow quickly.
They take nutrients away from plants/flowers.
Negative thoughts are like weeds. They are an energy drain.
We have to put in effort to remove them, take them out at the roots, plough the land (mind) and plant the seeds we want to nurture, feed, cultivate, blossom and bear fruit.
The world is on a negative bias and the work of Barbara Fredrickson on positive emotions shows that we need a ratio of 3:1 of positive emotions to negative to balance out the negative. Likewise for a wonderful bloom we need to plant many more flowers than weeds so there is hardly any room for the weeds to grow.
We have to actively remove the weeds/negative thoughts and cultivate the flowers/positivity we want to blossom, enjoy and share.
“Happiness held is the seed,
Happiness shared is the flower” - John Harrigan
A request dear friend and reader.
(1) If you have enjoyed some of the articles I have shared and found useful please reply to shaileen@happylifehabits.co.uk and let me know.
(2) If you are not a subscriber to the Happy Life Habits email list - please sign up.
(3) If you think someone else might benefit from this please share with them.
(4) If you want to engage my services for coaching, speaking or training get in touch and lets see if we can create a win-win result.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
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Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk
Take A Moment
Sometimes we just need to take a moment to catch our breath, reset ourselves or get ready of the next challenge. Take a moment now to reflect on the last few months of this year and what you have experienced and learnt. Take a moment to reflect on what you want to experience in the next 3 months and also by the end of the year. I’ll take a moment here to share what Happy Life Habits has planned over the next 3 months. We are your partner on the happiness journey.
Sometimes we just need to take a moment to catch our breath, reset ourselves or get ready of the next challenge. Take a moment now to reflect on the last few months of this year and what you have experienced and learnt. Take a moment to reflect on what you want to experience in the next 3 months and also by the end of the year. I’ll take a moment here to share what Happy Life Habits has planned over the next 3 months. We are your partner on the happiness journey.
Just 2 mins…
If Happy Life Habits has positively impacted your happiness & wellbeing levels by any of these:
Attending a course or workshop
Support during Mental Health Awareness Week
Participating in the book club
Attending a Happiness Booster session
Coaching session
Inspiration Point Podcast (live or recording)
Reading a blog article
Reading a post/video/quote etc on Facebook/ LinkedIn/ Instagram / YouTube etc
Just a chat
Then please take 2 mins to fill out this google review so we can reach and serve more people.
Inspiration Point Podcast Last Episode
This week we have the last episode of Inspiration Point Podcast Series 3 (attend with gifted ticket using promo code ‘GUEST’) . With that episode we have continuously served 12 weeks, each week of Inspiration Point Podcast through series 2 and series 3. The feedback from those who attended the live episodes is that majority:
Would recommend Inspiration Point Podcast to family and friends
Compared to start of episode, at the end of the episode their happiness levels were higher
I thank all the guests who have taken part in the 3 series we have had so far (18 episodes), the sponsors and all those who have attended the live episode or caught up on the recording. Each episode has been special, insightful, inspiring, positive and I have learnt much from it. There are patterns and differences. Please do share any feedback you may have.
If you would like to take part in a future episode or know someone who might please share this form. The more forms filled the sooner we can plan series 4 and 5 later this year.
Speaker Events
We continue to host and share events and also get invited to speak at those organised by various communities, groups, companies and organisations.
This week we take part in a wellness talk, as series organised by Shrimad Rajchandra Dharampar Mission. It is a free event open to all.
Happiness at Work - Help Wanted
We could do with your help to support Happiness at Work. We have a range of talks/workshops on offer and can also do bespoke sessions. If the below topics are of interest let your HR, Managers, Leaders, networks know of these services and we could be sharing them at your workplace to everyone’s benefit. Also see further below about Mental Health Awareness Week.
For a successful engagement we will thank you with the Happiness Journal (£25) used in the Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course.
SOME OF THE TOPICS OFFERED BY HAPPY LIFE HABITS INTO THE WORKPLACE ARE:
The Role of Effective Self-Care in Positive Leadership
A Framework for Work-Life Harmony
The 7 Habits of a Happy Workforce
Increasing Positivity & Resilience in Stressful Environments
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People (Stephen Covey’s work)
The Secret To Long Lasting Happiness: The Gratitude Workshop
Being Centred during uncertain, changing times
Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course
The Happy Life Habits Gratitude and Journal Habit Immersion Training Course will be one year old on 1st June. We just finished the March course and have June and November this year. For June we have option of morning sessions or evening sessions.
The course run over 30 days helps to develop habits in both Gratitude and Journaling and reap the benefits of these practices. The first session, a Journal Workshop has been extended to 90 mins from original 60 mins incorporating ideas on habits from various sources including: Atomic Habits - James Clear, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People - Stephen Covey and the ideas of B.J Fogg and Charles Duhigg.
If this year you want to deepen you Gratitude practice, develop it as a new one or add a journal practice then this is the course for you. The benefits delivered by the course are immense, far reaching and in excess of the investment price.
The course price will be going up on 17th May - after Mental Health Awareness Week. You can secure a place for June or Nov at the current price by registering before mid-May.
Really do not miss out on this opportunity to develop these skills during 2021, I currently have not idea if and what frequency will run the course in 2022.
Mental Health Awareness Week : 10-16 May
Last year we supported Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW) in various ways on each day. This year we will support MHAW. If you are aware of any resources or events please do let us know by 25th April so we can include them in an article before MHAW.
We have a free 21 Day Simple Living Challenge that will start on 10th May. Each day you get an email in your inbox with a thought, reflection or action and you can go onto the kindspring platform for the challenge and share your experiences and read the other participants. I found these challenges a brilliant support during the pandemic and lockdown months.
To join click here: https://www.kindspring.org/challenge/join/2041/
A request dear friend and reader.
(1) If you have enjoyed some of the articles I have shared and found useful please reply to shaileen@happylifehabits.co.uk and let me know.
(2) If you are not a subscriber to the Happy Life Habits email list - please sign up.
(3) If you think someone else might benefit from this please share with them.
(4) If you want to engage my services for coaching, speaking or training get in touch and lets see if we can create a win-win result.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Happy Life Habits FaceBook Community Group
Happy Life Habits FaceBook Page
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.