ARTICLES & BLOG
Self-Renewal Retreat: A Powerful Reset for Mind, Body & Soul
In our always-on, fast-paced world, burnout has become far too common. Many of us feel the strain — emotionally, mentally, even spiritually — yet we rarely give ourselves permission to truly pause.
Enter the Self-Renewal Retreat — a wellness experience designed to help you unplug, reflect, and reconnect with your authentic self.
A self-renewal retreat is a period dedicated to recharging and revitalizing one's physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being, often through focused activities and a break from daily routines.
They offer a chance to step away from stress, reconnect with oneself, and cultivate a renewed sense of purpose.
These intentional breaks are more than a luxury — they’re a path to sustainable well-being.
In our always-on, fast-paced world, burnout has become far too common. Many of us feel the strain — physically, emotionally, mentally, even spiritually — yet we rarely give ourselves permission to truly pause.
When we get too caught up in the busyness of the world, we lose connection with one another - and ourselves - Jack Kornfield
Enter the Self-Renewal Retreat — a wellness experience designed to help you unplug, reflect, and reconnect with your authentic self.
A self-renewal retreat is a period dedicated to recharging and revitalizing one's physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being, often through focused activities and a break from daily routines.
They offer a chance to step away from stress, reconnect with oneself, and cultivate a renewed sense of purpose.
These intentional breaks are more than a luxury — they’re a path to sustainable well-being.
A self-renewal retreat is a period dedicated to recharging and revitalizing one's physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being, often through focused activities and a break from daily routines.
What Is a Self-Renewal Retreat?
A self-renewal retreat is a restorative getaway centered on personal growth, rest, and self-awareness. Unlike typical vacations focused on activities and entertainment, these retreats offer stillness, solitude, and space to reflect.
These retreats can include:
Mindfulness and meditation sessions
Yoga or somatic movement
Breathwork and Laughter Yoga
Digital detox time
Journaling, Gratitude or creative expression
Self reflection and Introspection
Nature walks or forest bathing
Nutrient-rich, healing meals
Whether you're attending a weekend retreat with a group or planning a solo renewal retreat at a peaceful cabin, the goal is the same: to reset your nervous system and return to your life with clarity and energy.
Activities can include Laughter Yoga, Breathwork, Journaling, Gratitude, Mindfulness etc.
Why You Need a Self-Renewal Retreat
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, uninspired, or disconnected, a retreat can be a powerful catalyst for transformation.
Benefits of a self-renewal retreat include:
✅ Mental Clarity, Reduced Stress and Improved Mental Health: Stepping away from stressors and engaging in self-care practices can alleviate stress and improve mental well-being.
✅ Emotional Release: Allow space for healing and self-compassion
✅ Enhanced Creativity and Focus: Unplugging, Mindful practices and a relaxed state of mind can foster creativity and improve focus.
✅ Deeper Connection with Self and Increased Self Awareness: Time for reflection and introspection can lead to a deeper understanding of oneself. Opportunities to reconnect and re-align with one's values, goals, and purpose in life.
✅ True Rest, Renewed Energy and Motivation: Deep relaxation that supports physical and emotional vitality. A break from daily routines can help replenish energy levels and boost motivation.
A retreat can be a powerful catalyst for transformation
Types of Self-Renewal Retreats
You don’t need to travel across the world or spend a fortune. Here are a few options to consider:
At-Home Retreats:
Personal calendars and dedicated time blocks can create a wellness retreat at home, focusing on self-care and rejuvenation.Mini-Retreats:
Brief escapes, even a few hours, can provide a valuable opportunity for reflection and rejuvenation.Group Retreats:
These retreats offer a supportive environment for connecting with others, sharing experiences, and participating in guided activities.Guided Retreats:
Retreats led by facilitators can offer specialized programs like yoga, meditation, or other practices designed for self-renewal.
Retreats led by wellbeing facilitators Shaileen Shah and Saijal Ladd specialising in Gratitude, Journal, Breathwork, Meditation and other practices designed for self-renewal
Final Thought: Renewal Isn’t a Luxury — It’s a Necessity
Self-renewal is not selfish. It’s essential. These retreats aren’t about escaping life — they’re about returning to it with more energy, clarity, and purpose.
If you’re hearing the quiet inner nudge to slow down… listen. Book the weekend. Light the candle. Breathe deeper. Your soul is ready for renewal.
Our Self Renewal Retreats Offer An Opportunity To Relax, Refresh & Reconnect Your Mind, Body & Soul.
We offer weekend away retreats, day retreats and can help you deliver a retreat for your organisation, group or community.
Invest in your self-renewal at our retreats designed to re-energise, refresh and rejuvenate your wellbeing whilst connecting with like-minded people for an unforgettably meaningful experience in a beautiful countryside setting.
Attendees from first retreat gave an average 9/10 rating for their overall retreat experience
Register your interest, more info and FAQs about our retreats here
Happy Life Habits and Saij Wellness Self Renewal Retreat
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list (at the bottom of the page) and join the Happy Life Habits Community WhatsApp Group
Shaileen Shah - Happy Life Habits Coach, Speaker & Trainer
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list and join the Happy Life Habits Community WhatsApp Group
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Happy Life Habits Positively Impacting Happiness & Wellbeing Levels
Good Morning Routine
How we start our day can set the tone for the whole day.
I like to embed practices into my morning routine that support, enhance and rejuvenate my happiness, wellbeing (physical, mental, emotional, social and spiritual), positivity, energy and productivity.
The great thing is most of these only take 2-10 mins each and return much more for energy, attention, mindset and mood.
How we start our day can set the tone for the whole day.
Good Morning Vietnam!
Good Morning Vietnam : https://youtu.be/6S8MV523ASA?si=X49lZrobtHgLKJ_s
If you watch this clip of Robin Williams in Good Morning Vietnam I am sure you will be smiling / laughing by the end of it. His character was in Vietnam to uplift morale which he did through comedy in a morning radio show at 6:00am.
Morning Routine
How we start our day can set the tone for the whole day.
I like to embed practices into my morning routine that support, enhance and rejuvenate my happiness, wellbeing (physical, mental, emotional, social and spiritual), positivity, energy and productivity.
The great thing is most of these only take 2-10 mins each and return much more for energy, attention, mindset and mood.
These include:
Review my personal mission statement and goals
Gratitude
Journaling (Gratitude, Intentions, Affirmations)
Breathwork
Meditation/Mindfulness
Prayer
Learning
Exercise
Sharing a positive quote on HLH Quote Group
Over the last 18months or so - using the habit development strategy shared in 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course I have added the following practices to my established morning routine:
High 5 Habit (Mel Robbins)
Reading a page of the Daily Stoic
Listening to favourite playlist while journaling and doing exercises
Extended morning Prayers
Breathwork exercises - 2 since Sep 2024 Retreat
Sharing prompts for Gratitude Group Practice (Not daily)
They each have a cue, action and reward.
Mylenation
Repetition is a key component to building habits, routines and skill. With deliberate repetition we ingrain the neural pathways. The neurons go through mylenation, a membrane/sheet thickens around the neurons. Thereby insulating and increasing the speed of signals between neurons. Similar to insulation on wires or think of it like super fast fibre optic broadband.
A great example of this is with a new evening routine with my mum.
Evening Routine - The power of prayer
My mum is in her mid-eighties, has Parkinson’s Disease and Dementia too. Dementia causes memory and cognitive issues.
Once 9th April 2025 the very first Unite for World Peace: Navkar Mahamantra Day Celebration was organised by a group called JITO.
Jain organisation from across the world took part to chant the universal Jain prayer for 24 hours across the different countries and time zones.
There were community gatherings to recite in person, online and all of it was streamed.
Due to mum’s conditions and mobility were we not able to attend these community gatherings.
Instead we just did the prayer ourselves at home just before going into bed to go to sleep. Having learnt this prayer as a young child, through much repetition and mylenation my mum was able to sing the prayers from memory. It is a 9 line universal prayer.
This has now become our evening ritual where each night we recite together before she goes to bed. Sometimes I lead, sometimes she does.
We have added a forgiveness prayer, the Kshmapna. I’m not sure if she had learnt this as a child. However she is learning it through daily repetition.
I use is as my way of asking for forgiveness in any issues looking after/interacting with mum that day.
It is a sweet ritual that I cherish allowing me to have a moment where I can be present, connected and ask for forgiveness with her. I know this will change as her condition deteriorates and she ages.
Celebrating 5 Years of the Happy Life Habits 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course.
June 1st marks 5 years since Happy Life Habits launched its unique life changing 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course. This was during the Covid19 pandemic and lockdowns where people were feeling anxiety and stress. Emotional and Mental wellbeing was being impacted negatively.
After learning to create videos, edit, subtitle we created in a really short time videos to support during Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW) (same videos shared this MHAW). This including a live online workshop and the launch of the 30 Day Gratitude and Journal Habit Immersion Training Course.
About 20 people joined that initial course. I am grateful to that initial set of trainees and those subsequently for their faith, support, participation and feedback on the course. I felt we made a positive difference and keep doing so by sharing these valuable skills, habits and way of thinking.
The first course some found overwhelming as I had tried to give it all to them - the live sessions, journal practice, accountability, daily Facebook practice and also thrown in a 21 Day Gratitude Challenge on a different platform. It was extreme immersion.
We learnt from the experience to break things down, take it step by step, introducing new things bit by bit and help establish the habit and the learning gently so that it sticks. We learnt that learning and sharing together was powerful.
With each iteration of the course we made amending to improve and enhance the course and experience.
Now the course is broken down to be more that 30 days to provide that extra support and deepen the learning.
We now have a really comprehensive, one of a kind training course:
The Happiness Journal (The 5 minute Journal)
the Journal Workshop to start using the journal
Daily accountability / feedback on entries.
Weekly sessions to share more on gratitude, further the practice, address questions and challenges with the practice, enhance the practice with suggested actions
The 30 Day Facebook Daily practice is now on WhatsApp and this activity is done separately from the 30 Day Journaling Habit Development as a post course addition.
Celebration session / Meal
If you are interested in developing these positive habits register on the waiting list.
From 1st June in the HLH Gratitude Practice Group (https://chat.whatsapp.com/LbhAgWJ5ZSR4lYlrOp08c7) we will start our 10 Day Practice which we will extend through the month as we will likely pause for the Summer.
London Festival Of Architecture - A Walk through Space and Time in Mill Hill
Happy Life Habits is proud to be part of the London Festival of Architecture
We have organised a free walk titled "A Walk through Space and Time in Mill Hill" on Sunday 8th June from 9:30am - 12:00pm
If you would like to join here is the link:
https://www.londonfestivalofarchitecture.org/event/a-walk-through-space-and-time-in-mill-hill/
Please note there are limited tickets so act fast to secure your ticket.
NO Yoga Retreat! - Early Bird finishes at the end of the week
We (Saijal Ladd and I) have purposefully chosen not to have yoga at our Luxury Self Renewal Retreat at The Vedanta, Lincolnshire, 7-9th November.
Except Laugher Yoga which we will do.
Not because we are against yoga, in fact yoga is part of my morning route in terms of Sun Salutations (Surya Namaskar).
There are many benefits to the practice and way of life for our wellbeing.
We have chosen not to have yoga as there are many retreats and opportunities that offer yoga.
We want to offer something different that you can experience and incorporate into you daily life to benefit your happiness, wellbeing, energy and productivity.
That's why at our retreat we offer opportunities to experience:
Breathwork
Meditation
Laugher Yoga
Grounding
Walks
Gratitude
Journaling
Mindfulness
Sound Bath
Time to connect, reflect and be
Attendees of Sep 2024 rated their experience 9/10
What is included?
* Mix of workshops, activities, energisers and relaxation
* Workshop sessions led by Shaileen and Saijal
* Sessions to practice breathwork, meditation/mindfulness, movement, gratitude, journaling, sound bath & more
* 2 nights in shared accommodation with en-suite. Eco-friendly mattresses and Egyptian cotton sheets, guaranteeing a deep and restful sleep. Each room includes a welcome pack with body wash, shampoo, a vanity kit, lotions, and fluffy towels
* 2 Breakfasts, 2 Lunches, 2 Dinners - be nourished with wholesome, heart warming, vegetarian/vegan meals - no garlic/onion. Let us know of any allergies/dietary requirements
* Access to venue facilities (including our swimming pool and spa area with a sauna, steam room and jacuzzi, plus our 24-hour gym and games room) at designated times
* Refreshments station, with teas, coffees and hot drinks
* Walks in the beautiful grounds
* Relax & Connection time
* Various gifts worth £150+ including coaching session with each of Shaileen and Saijal
We also have pre-retreat and post-retreat session on zoom / in person and a Retreat Attendees WhatsApp group
Travel to and from the venue is not included - though lifts are often arranged with fellow attendees with a contribution to the fuel.
Register your interest, more info and FAQs at https://www.happylifehabits.co.uk/retreat
Banana Tree Reward Offer
The Banana Tree Restaurants have a referral program.
Sign up using my link and you'll get £10 off and I'll get a £10 voucher after you have visited the restaurant. A win-win for all.
https://gifts.bananatree.co.uk/claim/Shaileen-Shah-1747675099
25 Reminders to help you lead with meaning - Intelligent Change
This aligns with what we have shared in this blog.
1. What you focus on grows. Choose carefully.
2. People with clear values don’t get lost.
3. Discipline is freedom.
4. What you build will outlast what you buy.
5. Comfort zones are beautiful places. But nothing grows there.
6. You will never regret being kind.
7. Energy is your most valuable currency. Spend it like it matters.
8. If you don’t know what to do, do one thing well.
9. Your attention is your power. Stop giving it away for free.
10. The fastest way to earn respect is to do what you said you would.
11. Creativity is not a mood. It’s a decision.
12. No one is coming to give you permission.
13. If you’re waiting to feel ready, you’ll be waiting forever.
14. A good idea means nothing without execution.
15. You become what you repeat.
16. Say no more often. It’s a skill.
17. If you don’t define success for yourself, someone else will.
18. Action beats overthinking. Every time.
19. Your calendar shows what you really value.
20. Surround yourself with people who raise your standards.
21. Your future is built in five-minute choices.
22. Great work comes from curiosity, not certainty.
23. Don’t waste your life proving your worth.
24. Simplicity scales. Complexity breaks.
25. You don’t get more time. You get to decide what to do with it.
Shaileen Shah - Happy Life Habits Coach, Speaker & Trainer
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list and join the Happy Life Habits Community WhatsApp Group
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Happy Life Habits Positively Impacting Happiness & Wellbeing Levels
A Thousand Mile Journey Begins With The First Step...
Is you life too busy, boring or bland? If yes, read on, focus on self-renewal and energy management making your life beautiful by prioritising how you use your energy, time and attention to engage in activities that help you flourish, thrive, have zest and engagement to feel fully alive.
The year 1994 was a defining year in my life. I was just reflecting and realised that 2024 marks 30 years since I started my personal development and growth journey.
Is you life too busy, boring or bland? If yes, read on, focus on self-renewal and energy management making your life beautiful by prioritising how you use your energy, time and attention to engage in activities that help you flourish, thrive, have zest and engagement to feel fully alive.
The year 1994 was a defining year in my life. I was just reflecting and realised that 2024 marks 30 years since I started my personal development and growth journey. It was the year I also started my corporate IT career with a US based consulting firm by being proactive and creating my own luck. You can read more about it here: https://www.happylifehabits.co.uk/news/2023/08/01/work-ethic.
While working in Michigan, USA I was introduced to the classic and transformative The Seven Habits of Highly Effect People : Powerful Lessons in Personal Change by Dr Stephen R. Covey. This had a profound impact on me. Around the same time while working in Chicago I flew back to London for a long weekend in November to attend with my family the legendary Tony Robbin’s 2nd ever UK Unleash The Power Weekend (UPW) Seminar. This is the one where on the first night you end up doing a fire walk over hot, smouldering coals.
The 7 Habits and the UPW experience were my first steps on a journey of self development and growth and of sharing with others what I was learning. One major learning has been to focus on Habit 7: Sharpen the Saw: Principles of Balanced Self-Renewal.
habit 7 Sharpen the saw : Principles of Balanced self-renewal
Covey says
“Habit 7 is taking time to sharpen the saw. It surrounds the other habits in the Seven Habits paradigm because it is the habit that makes the others possible.”
“It’s preserving and enhancing the greatest asset you have - you. It’s renewing the four dimensions of your nature: physical, spiritual, mental, and social/emotional.”
“Taking time to sharpen the saw is a definite Quadrant II activity.”
“This is the single most powerful investment we can ever make in life - investment in ourselves, in the only instrument we have with which to deal with life and to contribute. We are the instruments of our own performance, and to be effective, we need to recognise the importance of taking time regularly to sharpen the saw in all four ways.”
Physical: Exercise, Nutrition, Stress Management
Metal: Reading, Visualising, Planning, Writing
Social/Emotional: Service, Empathy, Synergy, Intrinsic Security
Spiritual: Value Clarification and Commitment, Study and Meditation
The Self-Renewal Retreat
We have organised for end of September will share sessions on Self-Renewal and Energy Management. The Self Renewal was instilled from ideas from The Seven Habits of Highly Effect People : Powerful Lessons in Personal Change by Dr Stephen R. Covey my first personal development book and start of my self development and growth journey. The Energy Management from my current book Arete by Brian Johnson and Heroic Coaching.
The focus on these themes have helped through out my journey and in particular in my current roles as a carer for my mum, family man, being of service in volunteer work for community organisation Young Jains and sharing through Happy Life Habits.
Acutely aware that Life is Short, I have habits, awareness and priority for how I use my Time (Planning, Priorities, Quadrant II), Energy ( Eat, Sleep, Move, Breathe) and Focus.
H.E.A.L.T.H =
Happy
energy
attention
life
time
habits
Progress on mastering these six, designing and crafting them into your awareness and every day routines will lead you to have a beautiful life.
Here is my very first blog article on Happy Habits for a Happy Life.
https://www.happylifehabits.co.uk/news/2019/1/15/happy-habits-for-happy-life-1
"The clocks may have gone forward one hour, we may have "lost" one hour. What's more important is how we use the hours we have left."
Shaileen Shah - Happy Life Habits Coach, Speaker and Trainer
Recently I had a one week period of amazing experiences reminding me of how far I’ve come, my purpose and passion and the things that are important for Happiness, Health, Wellbeing and to flourish.
These were:
Thursday:
Last session of set of 5 of the Happy Life Habits Book Club with is working through the book Arete by Brian Johnson.. This was an engaging session with lots of insight sharing, differences made by applying the ideas and I left with good energy and motivation.
Friday:
Session 8 of my Every Day Happiness 10 week course with Mind in Enfield and Barnet. The topic was journaling. The attendees have been given course work for a few weeks to apply practices and it is wonderful to hear about them going for it, seeing the impact on their happiness score and observations of the what they experience.
Sunday:
We ran a in person Social Connection event with Young Jains, an organisation that has had a big impact on me and one that I have the opportunity to be of service to. A small group gathered, some familiar faces some meeting for the first time. We had deep and meaningful conversations that helped use connect and know each better. This was facilitated by some group questions such as “What is your favourite book and why?” to using various cards for one to one interaction. There was warmth, trust, open sharing and a strong sense of connection and belonging with like minded people. Social Connection is vital for our happiness, health and wellbeing.
The Social Connection continued with conversations continuing over a delicious vegetarian/vegan meal at Little Resham. Food for mind and the body. You can get a 5% discount at Little Resham if you mention Shaileen Happy Life Habits.
Wednesday:
On International Day of Happiness I had the opportunity to share a talk on The Science of Happiness. An opportunity due to relationship building and persistence. This was great as I was living my purpose and sharing my passion.
Thursday:
A colleague calling me at 12:40pm just as I was getting ready for lunch. He said he was stuck in traffic and if I could run an online taster session at 1pm, in 20mins. I said I would call him back in 2 minutes once I had check something. I called him back, said yes. Set up my computer, opened the slide deck and joined the online platform to share a session. It went well.
In the evening I ran the first of 3 Free Positive Grief sessions in the lead up to June’s Growing Around Grief : 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course.
Here are some of the comments in feedback:
“Thank you for the informative session. Hoping to use your methods to grow around the grief to support me”
“That was a really good reminder of all aspects of grief brought together. Love that you have brought all aspects in a positive way”
“Loved being part of this session.”
Why and How
I was able to do all this due to putting time and effort into learning content, developing skills, building relationships, handling set backs and having a gut feeling that it was the right thing to do . I have developed inner confidence in that I have deep trust in myself that I can handle whatever unfolds.
The beauty of this book club there is not set number of pages to read till the next session. You read what you can, apply what you want and when we meet share accordingly. This takes away the pressure of having to have reached a certain point or to keep up with everyone else. The sharing by all gives deeper and different perspective on ideas, inspires and motivates. A great opportunity to consistently focus on Learning and Growth, an aspect that is key for our happiness and health.
Details here of the next set of dates, if you would like to attend a session to see how it works get in touch:
Shaileen Shah - Happy Life Habits Coach, Speaker & Trainer
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list and join the Happy Life Habits Community WhatsApp Group
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Happy Life Habits Positively Impacting Happiness & Wellbeing Levels
Looking Forward and Creating Magic
Having things to look forward to has a positive impact on us. The holiday or the together that you have planned; you enjoy the anticipation leading up to the event sometimes more than the actual event. Looking forward also can fill us with hope. I’ve enjoyed planning things and having activities to look forward to, they have helped to navigate the turbulent experiences life gives us.
Self Care Retreat
Having things to look forward to has a positive impact on us. The holiday or the together that you have planned; you enjoy the anticipation leading up to the event sometimes more than the actual event. Looking forward also can fill us with hope. I’ve enjoyed planning things and having activities to look forward to, they have helped to navigate the turbulent experiences life gives us.
In December I worked on the Year Compass and the Mel Robbins Best Year planner that I have shared in the Happy Life Habits WhatsApp Community. I filled out the planners, looking back on the last year and the plans for the forthcoming year. In addition to more corporate opportunities two I had added as dream/stretch goals were : (1) A retreat and (2) a TED Style talk.
I am excited that plans are progressing for both of these faster than anticipated. This is due to the power of goal setting visualisation, planning, nurturing relationships, taking action. In doing these I set my subconscious in motion and when the opportunities came or I created it was like magic.
In the supermarket after not being in direct touch for many years I bumped into good friend of mine, Saijal. We had served together as volunteers with the Young Jains community. We re-connected and later she reached out with an idea of doing a self care retreat together. I am looking forward to it, sharing our individual skills and experiences to offer great value to the attendees.
We are organising a 3 night / 4 day Self Care Retreat in the Autumn:
Invest in yourself at this self care retreat in a beautiful setting whilst connecting with like-minded people
The retreat offers yoga, breathwork, meditation, gratitude, journaling sessions as well as group life coaching workshops.
Share open discussions & conversations
Providing you with self care tools to be the best version of yourself to perform your various roles.
Get in touch to express interest for more details.
In relation to the TED Style talk, I have been booked for a private session for International Day of Happiness to share about Happiness. Do get in touch if you have any opportunities.
Happiness Boosters: A Shot of Positivity
In addition to the various workshops and talks for the corporate space, businesses, organisations and charities we are offering Happiness Boosters: A Shot of Positivity. BOOST Wellbeing, Productivity, Resilience & Positivity. A fun, interactive, small group, online / in person Happiness Booster that lifts the mood, energy & connection. Designed to support Mental, Emotional, Social Wellbeing & Positive Growth Mindsets. Scientific proven practices (e.g. Gratitude, Mindfulness, Kindness ).
Book this for you team, Department, Clients, Networking / Community / Charity Group
Team building, Wellbeing Days, Mental Health Days. Offsites, Ice Breaker, Orientations, Retreats, Conferences
For each referral you give that leads to a booking we will reward you with the option of: A Happiness Journal or 10% off Happy Life Habits Training courses/workshops or 45 min 1:2:1 coaching session.
Happiness Boosters: A Shot of Positivity. BOOST Wellbeing, Productivity, Resilience & Positivity.
Social Connection - International Day of Happiness
Many a time we have shared the importance of social connection and positive relationships for our happiness and wellbeing. Our Social Connection offering comes together for a meal, conversation and celebration. Last year we gathered in Autumn for Diwali/ Thanksgiving. Our next one is in March for International Day of Happiness.
Join the HLH Social Connection WhatsApp Group if interested.
HLH Book Club
In the 2 book club sessions we have had interesting conversations. Each of us is reading the Arete book at our own pace. We are coming together and sharing our insights, application and seeking perspectives and clarity. It is a great learning opportunity. Some recent information on Brain Health highlighted the benefits of continuous learning, social connection, nutrition and movement for good brain health and to reduce chances of Dementia,
One conversation has been on the Viktor Frank quote:
“BETWEEN STIMULUS AND RESPONSE THERE IS A SPACE.
IN THAT SPACE LIES OUR FREEDOM AND POWER TO CHOOSE OUR RESPONSE.
IN THOSE CHOICES LIES OUR GROWTH AND OUR FREEDOM (HAPPINESS)”
One has been what do we do to create that space to choose our response and another what does it mean by Freedom? Send your answers on a postcard or join the Book Club!
We have also looked at Energy from the Energy, Work and Love triplet. Choosing something we can commit to do, as a small change between one Book Club session and the next in order to put the theory into action. Various actions chosen such as : more walking, less sweets, no biscuits or fizzy drinks for 10 of the 14 days, going to bed earlier and drinking more water. We share our experiences at the next session and choose another small action to commit to for the next 2 weeks.
Happy Life Habits Book Club
Happy Life Habits 21 Day Challenge: Reverence
Before the pandemic and lockdowns started in 2020 I had hosted a 21 Day challenge. It helped me very much during this period that I continued to host a further 4 in subsequent months on themes of gratitude, kindness, simple living and mindfulness.
21 Day challenges are a great way to get new perspectives, shift mindset, develop discipline, consistency, learn, connect and grow.
I am hosting another free 21 Day Challenge on the theme of Reverence starting at the end of Feb and running till International Day of Happiness on March 20.
To join the challenge and receive the daily challenge emails click here :
https://www.kindspring.org/challenge/join/2239/
In addition this time we have a HLH Challenge WhatsApp Group where details of zoom catch ups during the challenge period will be shared.
Join the Happy Life Habits Challenge WhatsApp group for potential zoom sessions during the challenge.
Here is an example of one of the daily emails.
To join the challenge and receive the daily challenge emails click here :
30 Day Gratitude & Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course for Growing Around Grief
In recent months we have experienced grief with anniversary of the death of my father, death of my father in law and other death anniversaries and losses. Gratitude and Journaling helps big time.
We have adapted our core 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course to offer support for Growing around Grief. The live zoom sessions will have activities and exercises related to growing around grief plus opportunity to share and support each other.
The Positive Grief Talk will be part of this offering.
Dates are being finalised, you can join waiting list.
Shaileen Shah - Happy Life Habits Coach, Speaker & Trainer
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list and join the Happy Life Habits Community WhatsApp Group
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Happy Life Habits Positively Impacting Happiness & Wellbeing Levels
End Of Year Review 2023
Review 2023
At various points in the year I take a moment to review the preceding time period and what is forthcoming. This is often at the end of the year with the Looking Back, Looking Forward workshop, the middle of the year and sometimes ad hoc too.
Like journaling, writing and sharing the review helps me celebrate the wins, learn from the challenges, see growth and gratefully acknowledge the opportunities.
My chosen highlights for 2023
Here are the themes for my chosen personal and professional highlights for 2023 with a brief example. Details on these continue in the blog article.
Commitments, Learning & Habits-
The projects and roles I have committed to I have delivered on. What has helped is consistency, focus, intention & creativity. I have worked from my strengths, stretched, stepped out of my comfort zone, attempted new ideas, used a growth mindset, been resourceful and drawn upon my various past experiences.
Social Connection and Celebration - Various birthdays and anniversaries are celebrated including milestone ones.
Rest & Renewal - much needed overdue holiday break in Kenya with Masai Mara Balloon Safari, forest walks and relaxation at the beach
Community Service & Volunteering - Mental Health Awareness Week digital support and masterclass on Anxiety
Achievements & Creative Innovation - Becoming a certified Heroic Performance Coach from 300 Day coaching program
Review 2023
At various points in the year I take a moment to review the preceding time period and what is forthcoming. This is often at the end of the year with the Looking Back, Looking Forward workshop, the middle of the year and sometimes ad hoc too.
Like journaling, writing and sharing the review helps me celebrate the wins, learn from the challenges, see growth and gratefully acknowledge the opportunities.
Here is review from 2021, 2022 and mid year 2023.
My chosen highlights for 2023
Here are my chosen personal and professional highlights for 2023. Details on these continue in the article.
Commitments, Learning & Habits -
The projects and roles I have committed to I have delivered on. What has helped is consistency, focus, intention & creativity. I have worked from my strengths, stretched, stepped out of my comfort zone, attempted new ideas, used a growth mindset, been resourceful and drawn upon my various past experiences.
A daily focus on learning, self care / renewal, mission statement review, setting intentions, gratitude, journaling, meditation, exercise, nutrition, virtue cultivation, planning, reflection, developing new positive habits have been the bedrock to allow the successes, opportunities, deal with the challenges and be resilient.
Social Connection and Celebration
Various birthdays and anniversaries celebrated including milestone ones.
Happy Life Habits lunches to celebrate 3 years of 30 Day Gratitude & Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course and second annual Thanksgiving Lunch.
Catch up and get togethers.
Rest & Renewal - much needed overdue holiday break in Kenya with Masai Mara Balloon Safari (Bucket List), forest walks and relaxation at the beach
Community Service & Volunteering
Pure Soul exhibition
Young Jains NEC
Focus on Forgiveness digital offering
Mental Health Awareness Week digital support and masterclass on Anxiety
Workshops for World Values Day - What Values would you die for?
Achievements & Creative Innovation
Becoming a certified Heroic Performance Coach from 300 Day coaching program
Being a Heroic Ambassador
Join the SoulBrite Winning Wellbeing team - taking part in LinkedIn Lives
Launch of Inner Compass - Program for deeper clarity on your life, time, energy and focus
Move to Happy Life Habits WhatsApp Community with various subgroups
Dedicated Mental Health group with Master Class on Anxiety and daily support / sharing for Mental Health Awareness Week
Daily sharing of Positive quote in Daily Quote group - to start the day with a positive
Publishing Every Day Happiness Book
Mind In Enfield & Barnet asking us to design and deliver a 10 week course on Happiness in addition to the Gratitude for Wellbeing Workshop.
Happy Life Habits Community Facebook Group - Each week on various days sharing of a question that promotes happiness and wellbeing
Purely digital/online daily offering for Jain Festival of Forgiveness
This was shared at the 6 month review blog in June https://www.happylifehabits.co.uk/news/2023/08/01/work-ethic-e585y
___________________________________________________
The year started with a key note presentation for an HR conference in Athens.
We launched a new program Inner Compass and continued with the Master Mind Program.
Took part in 2 podcasts : People on Purpose and Estrella of Happiness - Within You.
Delivered two 3 hour workshops on Gratitude for Wellbeing for the charity Mind in Enfield and Barnet and supported Mental Health Awareness Week on the theme of anxiety sharing resources daily in a dedicated WhatsApp group and Master Class on Anxiety.
Our flag ship 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course celebrated it’s 3rd year. We positively impacted trainees when we ran the course in March and a last minute decision for June. June was opened as free gifted refresher to previous attendees.
We celebrated completion of the June course and three year anniversary for the first time with an in person celebration dinner (which was open invite for all Happy Life Habits Community members) at the restaurant Little Resham. We shared delicious, vegan food, conversations and connected deeper with the use of the gratitude cards.
_________________________________
In addition to those shared above here are some more Happy Life Habits and personal highlights
Got Oshwal Connect New Years Honours List Award for the Mental Health and Wellbeing work
Organised a virtual surprise for my friend Priti who was celebrating her 50th Birthday. We had an Inner Compass/Master Mind session scheduled on her birthday. At the end of the session she was surprised on return from break out room when many of her friends and family had joined. We all shared memories and qualities that we saw in her. Awesome part was that in addition it to being a complete surprise we recorded the sharing and she now has that a gift to look upon and savour the memories.
We celebrated my wife Harshna’s 50th too with various get togethers. There were various milestone birthdays and anniversaries we were able to take part in celebrating, connection and creating memories.
Met up with a few university friends from 30 years ago
Ran Daily Facebook part of 30 Day course in November for past course attendees and also had annual Thanksgiving Lunch
My son finished his first year at University, passed his driving test and I’m just beaming with pride at his maturity and cultivation of virtues. The first time we went for driving practice in the family car after he had already been having lessons I was a little cautious. Watching him do all the safety checks and drive diligently the cautiousness went away and I feel really safe when he is driving.
Rest & Renewal
We had an awesome Summer break in Kenya, our first since Covid and lockdowns. Time spent with different family members for parts such as trip to Nanyuki near the foothills for Mount Kenya where the Equator is. A memorable experience was a trek to swim in waterfall lagoon at Ngare Ndare Forest. This was followed with a Masai Mara safari and ended with a whole family trip to the Mombasa including the South coast beach.
Many memories and wonderful experiences created. In particular the Masai Mara trip where on one particular day we set off before sunrise to watch the sunrise from a Balloon Safari (Bucket List) over the Masai Mara plains. An amazing experience followed by a bush breakfast. We did safari the whole day with a delicious picnic lunch inside the Mara where zebras were our backdrop. in In that one day we saw all of the Big Five : Elephants, Rhino (rare), Leopard (rare), Lions and Buffalo. More than 12 hours later we ended the day after the afternoon safari with a sunset sundowners.
Community Service & volunteering
As Happy Life Habits we supported for free Mental Health Awareness Week in May. The theme was anxiety. We shared daily videos, articles and quotes on a dedicated HLH Mental Health WhatsApp Group. An anxiety masterclass was shared.
Late February I was invited to join the Pure Soul team that was delivering 2 weekends of community events as SOAS university as part of the Pure Soul exhibition related to the Jain faith. I joined the team to assist with this project and draw upon my experiences for projects and leadership roles in Young Jains and SCVP as well as those gained from Happy Life Habits. I helped provide support, guidance, communication, create and coordinate a volunteer team. As Young Jains we delivered a workshop on Radical Forgiveness. Priti and I played the MC roles of the Sunday afternoon.
I rejoined the Young Jains NEC (non executive committee) at the end of July to aid the organisation which is facing various challenges.
Within the first few days against the odds I proposed an idea to deliver an digital offering for the Jain forgiveness festival of Paryushan at the start of September. Leading up to the festival, during and after we had a dedicated Focus on Forgiveness WhatsApp group. Each day we shared in English articles, quotes, songs, poems and awareness actions. For four evenings we delivered live online reflection sessions.
On World Values Day in October we offered 2 workshops: What Values would you die for? . One had no attendees despite registrations. This was disappointing. The second session was well received by those who attended. A strong reminder that our role is to show up, do our duty and understand that the results/outcomes are not in our hand.
List of articles shared in 2023
Here are links to articles shared this year.
INNER CHEERLEADER INSTEAD OF INNER CRITIC
MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS WEEK 2023 : 15TH - 21ST MAY: THEME ANXIETY
MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS WEEK: ANXIETY RESOURCES
A STRONG WORK ETHIC - WORKING 9 TO ...
Many thanks for your support, encouragement and engagement during the last year. We look forward to continuing to serve you in the new year.
Shaileen Shah - Happy Life Habits Coach, Speaker & Trainer
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list and join the Happy Life Habits Community WhatsApp Group
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
A Christmas Care - Role (Carol) Who Cares? for the Carer? Dementia/Parkinson's/Old Age/Grief/Loneliness
In the story of Jesus’ birth there are three kings who come bearing gifts. In Charles Dickens’ The Christmas Carol there are 4 ghosts who visit Ebeneezer Scrooge. His business partner Jacob Marley and the ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future.
On 11th Dec 2020 our world changed when my father suddenly passed (https://www.happylifehabits.co.uk/news/2020/12/24/live-love-learn-amp-legacy) away within 36 hours. He was the primary carer for my mum. We had the gifts and ghosts of : Old age, Grief, Loneliness, Parkinsons and Dementia. That was part of our inheritance.
Without those gifts and ghosts this article would not be written, published and shared.
As time goes by the probability that someone close to you will be impacted by dementia is increasing.
“One of the hardest things in life is to know that you can not stop the decline as you witness firsthand the diminishing cognitive capacity of a loved one due to progressive incurable neurological conditions such as Parkinson’s or Dementia.
To observe them becoming a shadow of themselves day by day; the impact on their physical, mental, emotional, social and spiritual wellbeing. Knowing there is nothing you can do to stop that decline. Experiencing the loss each day as anticipatory grief.”
Shaileen Shah - Carer, Happy Life Habits Coach, Speaker and Trainer.
This article is about my role as a carer for my mum who is elderly, grieving, lonely and suffering from the progressive and incurable neurological conditions of both Parkinson’s and Dementia. It shares the perspective of the carer, the challenges faced, how best to look after yourself as well as how to look after and interact with someone who has these conditions or someone you are caring for.
I salute all those who are carers of any type and ask you to support those who you know who are doing a caring role.
In the story of Jesus’ birth there are three kings who come bearing gifts. In Charles Dickens’ The Christmas Carol there are 4 ghosts who visit Ebeneezer Scrooge. His business partner Jacob Marley and the ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future.
On 11th Dec 2020 our world changed when my father suddenly passed (https://www.happylifehabits.co.uk/news/2020/12/24/live-love-learn-amp-legacy) away within 36 hours. He was the primary carer for my mum. We had the gifts and ghosts of : Old age, Grief, Loneliness, Parkinson’s and Dementia. That was part of our inheritance.
Without those gifts and ghosts this article would not be written, published and shared.
As time goes by, the probability that someone close to you will be impacted by dementia is increasing.
“One of the hardest things in life is to know that you cannot stop the decline as you witness firsthand the diminishing cognitive capacity of a loved one due to progressive incurable neurological conditions such as Parkinson’s or Dementia.
To observe them becoming a shadow of themselves day by day; the impact on their physical, mental, emotional, social and spiritual wellbeing. Knowing there is nothing you can do to stop that decline. Experiencing the loss each day as anticipatory grief.”
This article is about my role as a carer for my mum who is elderly, grieving, lonely and suffering from the progressive and incurable neurological conditions of both Parkinson’s and Dementia. It shares the perspective of the carer, the challenges faced, how best to look after yourself as well as how to look after and interact with someone who has these conditions or someone you are caring for.
I salute all those who are carers of any type and ask you to support those who you know who are doing a caring role.
“Once, a student approached Rumi and asked, How should I deal with the pain and suffering in life?”
Rumi, in his wisdom, decided to share a story:
”There was a man who sought the wisdom of a great sage, hoping to find a way to escape his suffering. The sage looked at the man and said, ‘I will help you, but first, you must do something for me. Take this spoon, fill it with oil, and walk through the town without spilling a drop.’
”The man thought this task was simple enough and agreed. He took the spoon, filled it with oil, and began to walk through the town. As he carefully balanced the spoon, he couldn’t help but focus all his attention on not spilling any oil.
”When he returned to the sage, the sage asked, ‘Did you see the beautiful flowers in the town square? Did you notice the children playing and the laughter of families?’ The man realized he had been so fixated on the spoon that he hadn’t noticed anything else.
”The sage then said, ‘This is the key to dealing with pain. Just as you were so focused on the spoon that you missed the beauty around you, when you are consumed by your suffering, you miss the beauty of life. Pain is like the spoon, and life is like the town. Don’t let the pain consume your entire focus. Remember to look around and appreciate the beauty that still exists.’”
The student understood the sage’s message: while pain and suffering are part of life, it’s essential not to let them overshadow the beauty and joy that can be found in every moment. This story serves as a reminder that even in the face of pain, there is an opportunity to find meaning and beauty in life.
”
From Parkinson's UK (https://www.parkinsons.org.uk/information-and-support/what-parkinsons)
Parkinson's is a progressive neurological condition. This means that it causes problems in the brain and gets worse over time. People with Parkinson's don't have enough of the chemical dopamine in their brain because some of the nerve cells that make it have stopped working.
From Dementia UK (https://www.dementiauk.org/information-and-support/about-dementia/what-is-dementia/):
Dementia is an umbrella term for a range of progressive conditions that affect the brain.
Each type of dementia stops a person’s brain cells (neurones) working properly in specific areas, affecting their ability to remember, think and speak.
Doctors typically use the word ‘‘dementia’’ to describe common symptoms – such as memory loss, confusion, and problems with speech and understanding – that get worse over time.
Some films and books about Dementia:
Films:
You, Me Aur Hum - Bollywood movie with Kajol and Ajay Devgn. Powerful scenes including one where Kajol has gone shopping and forgets her way home.
Still Alice - Powerful story of a young professor diagnosed with Alzheimer’s soon after her 50th birthday.
The Father - very moving depiction with Anthony Hopkins
The NoteBook
Books
Mum, Me, White Lies and Tea: My journey into the heart of dementia - Ten lessons from accompanying my mum on her journey with dementia by my friend Nick Williams. (Get in touch if you want a signed copy)
Trials and Tribulations of a Carer for Parkinson’s and Dementia
A typical day (though there is no typical day) in my life as a carer for my mum who has progressive incurable neurological conditions Parkinson’s and Dementia. This means she sometimes does not know what to do, cannot follow a sequence of instructions, needs to be told repeatedly, is not independently mobile requiring a Zimmer frame to move about, can lose balance and have a fall, lives in a different reality and can get frustrated easily and have a change in mood. I share here some of the trials and tribulations to give an insight into some of the challenges a Carer has. Routine is important as is regularly giving the Parkinson’s medications at the correct time 5-6 times a day.
Robin Sharma shares the 5am club. Those who get up at 5am and use the hour to reflect, do journaling, learning and exercise. On some days I am part of the 2am, 3:30am, 4am, 4:30am club and everything in between too. (As I write this section mid morning we have been up from 2am -7am). This is when my mum has woken up during the early hours to go to the bathroom or just feeling unsettled. It can be no wakes up, 1 or 2 wakeups or multiple wakeups over a few hours. This broken sleep / sleep deprivation and intensity of interaction can lead to energy lows, heavy head, brain fog impacting plans for the day.
A trip to the bathroom is a 20 min round trip. On average 2 or 3 per night. Sometimes you have just taken, tucked into bed and within 5 minutes need to visit again.
Getting her ready to go to bed involves giving last meds, helping to get changed, settle into bed etc. This is a 30-40 min activity.
She asks for water just after you have got her tucked up into bed.
Due to the medications and changes in the brain she can experience hallucinations, different reality, emotional roller coaster and be illogical.
Both mum and I can share angry words or actions due to stress, lack of sleep, frustration, low energy.
Sometimes when I am on a zoom call I have to excuse myself or switch off video and audio in order to attend to mum’s needs.
When doing deep work or creative work the flow can be disrupted due to distractions and disturbances in looking after mum. This involves task switching which takes up energy.
Even though my father passed away about 3 years ago, mum asks “When will he come? Where is he?”. Having been brought up to tell the truth and not telling lies being a part of my faith I initially used to explain to her that he has passed away. From learning about dementia from literature and the Dementia Club UK Awareness Training we now have to tell a lie or half truths and say he is out but fine or not to worry and he will come later. We have to step into her reality and reassure her.
Each day can be like Groundhog Day, during the day having the same conversation or giving the same instructions again and again, as for them they have forgotten and it is for the first time in their reality.
No real concept of time.
Excellent video about Dementia, I really resonate with this : https://youtu.be/EuRHHmXbzYs
We are fortunate that we share caring responsibilities over the family members and get support from external carers. However if the carer does not come on a particular day it means we have to drop plans and shift focus and responsibilities.
Giving Care
This brilliant article I got from Dementia Club UK in their weekly email. These tips can apply to anyone with whatever they are dealing with. I get it wrong so often, this helps to remind and refocus.
https://www.agingcare.com/articles/caregiving-tips-teepa-snow-180395.htm
Dementia Caregiving Tips from Teepa Snow
My name is Teepa Snow, and I am a dementia care and education specialist. My personal mission is to better the lives of people with dementia—as well as the lives of their caregivers—by sharing what I have learned. An occupational therapist by training, I have been called “the horse whisperer of dementia.”
It can be difficult, frustrating and confusing to care for a person with dementia. In order to be successful in changing behavior when frustration mounts, it comes down to how we respond to what is happening and what we choose to do.
Five Tips to Help Dementia Caregivers Cope
1. Step Back
When an interaction is not going well, you have a choice: you can push your agenda and watch things get worse, or you can step back and think. What’s happening is often more complicated than it appears on the surface. In an effort to be helpful, you may have created a problem. The person who is challenging you is doing the very best they can with what cognitive abilities they have left. Stop judging them.
Learn to be a good detective. Your brain works better than theirs, so use it! Step back and assess their abilities. Know what you are working with. Try to figure out what might be driving the person. Analyze the situation. What are you seeing? What are you hearing? What might be their unmet emotional need? How about their unmet physical need? Why might they be doing what they are doing? What are they trying to communicate? You need to try to see things from their point of view.
2. Respond (Don’t React)
What you thought would happen didn’t happen. The person did not react the way you wanted (or expected) them to. You’re getting frustrated and you’re getting angry. What to do?
Stop reacting and stop your behavior of trying to correct them. Stop pointing out errors or mistakes. Stop trying to fix things. Stop raising your voice, and stop pushing your agenda. “Remember, I already told you that!” Do you find yourself repeating that sentence? It’s time to stop! Don’t argue with them.
What will be more helpful is to use the words they have given you. It’s called reflective narrative language and it will support their ability to make connections. Repeat back to them what they have said to you—acknowledge and validate what they are feeling. It is not helpful to focus on who is right or wrong, but it is often helpful to apologize (for whatever happened). Say something like, “I’m sorry this happened,” or, “I’m sorry I upset you, I was trying to help.”
3. Make Plans, but Expect Them to Change
Create a plan, think it through and get organized. Have a schedule. You know what you want to happen. However, when it doesn’t, you have to be flexible.
If your plan isn’t working, you can’t force it! It’s part of your care agenda. Adjust your plans as needed. It was just a plan! Figure out where to go or what to do instead. Having alternatives ready is necessary and helpful. Create Plan A, but always have a Plan B, Plan C or even Plan D at the ready.
4. Figure out What You Can (and Can’t) Control
Stop trying to control what you can’t control. This is so important to realize. You can’t control their dementia or their past (who they’ve been or their routines and preferences that may now be exaggerated or problematic). And, you can’t control/fix/change their behavior.
You do have some control, however, over their environment—their physical and sensory experiences. This includes where they are, the objects they use or have access to, and how you guide or help to direct their time. Consider how you can make a difference for both of you.
Pay attention to what helps them feel valued and important, as well as when they relax and regain their energy. Try to prioritize the most important things and what must get done. Know your agenda, but don’t show your agenda. Practice recognizing if/when something doesn’t go as you hoped and managing your response.
You can figure out how to get yourself under control, and you can build your skills and knowledge about how to better live with dementia. Change what you can change and then let go of the rest.
5. Take Care of Yourself
When it’s not working, when something you tried to do didn’t work, or when you’re getting frustrated or angry, you absolutely need to learn to take a time out. It’s critical to step away from the situation. Take at least three deep breaths—breathe in and out deeply!
When you are frustrated, angry or in despair, the person you are caring for picks up on and reacts to your stress level and intensity. They may not fully understand what you are feeling or why, but they will be impacted by your tone of voice, body language and emotional state. When you’re angry, you’re no good to them or to yourself.
Breathing deeply will help you get back to neutral, lower your stress level, and help you regain perspective about the situation you are trying to problem solve. Also, don’t hesitate to ask for help. Putting support systems in place for surprising times when living with dementia is critical. Dementia care is hard work!
About Teepa Snow
Teepa is an occupational therapist and dementia education specialist who works closely with dementia specialty service providers to develop and optimize programs and services to people living with dementia, their care partners and family members.
Communicating and Interacting
Here are some tips, rules and information that help with communication and interaction. Useful for general communication not just when with Parkinson’s Dementia patients.
If you interact with someone with Dementia, this is a really useful list of Golden Rules as is the Parkinson’s Dementia leaflet linked at the end
“16 Things I would Want if I Got Dementia”
by Rachael Wonderlin (rachaelwonderlin.com.)
(Copyright Registration No. TX0008332487)
If I get dementia, I’d like my family to hang this wish list up on the wall where I live. I want them to remember these things.
1. If I get dementia, I want my friends and family to embrace my reality.
2. If I think my spouse is still alive, or if I think we’re visiting my parents for dinner, let me believe those things. I’ll be much happier for it.
3. If I get dementia, don’t argue with me about what is true for me versus what is true for you.
4. If I get dementia, and I am not sure who you are, do not take it personally. My timeline is confusing to me.
5. If I get dementia, and can no longer use utensils, do not start feeding me. Instead, switch me to a finger-food diet, and see if I can still feed myself.
6. If I get dementia, and I am sad or anxious, hold my hand and listen. Do not tell me that my feelings are unfounded.
7. If I get dementia, I don’t want to be treated like a child. Talk to me like the adult that I am.
8. If I get dementia, I still want to enjoy the things that I’ve always enjoyed. Help me find a way to exercise, read, and visit with friends.
9. If I get dementia, ask me to tell you a story from my past.
10. If I get dementia, and I become agitated, take the time to figure out what is bothering me.
11. If I get dementia, treat me the way that you would want to be treated.
12. If I get dementia, make sure that there are plenty of snacks for me in the house. Even now if I don’t eat I get angry, and if I have dementia, I may have trouble explaining what I need.
13. If I get dementia, don’t talk about me as if I’m not in the room.
14. If I get dementia, don’t feel guilty if you cannot care for me 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It’s not your fault, and you’ve done your best. Find someone who can help you, or choose a great new place for me to live.
15. If I get dementia, and I live in a dementia care community, please visit me often.
16. If I get dementia, don’t act frustrated if I mix up names, events, or places. Take a deep breath. It’s not my fault.
17. If I get dementia, make sure I always have my favourite music playing within earshot.
18. If I get dementia, and I like to pick up items and carry them around, help me return those items to their original place.
19. If I get dementia, don’t exclude me from parties and family gatherings.
20. If I get dementia, know that I still like receiving hugs or handshakes.
21. If I get dementia, remember that I am still the person you know and love.
Click here for the Parkinson’s Leaflet
Self Care
“I can’t afford to become ill. I have to stay in good health and energy in order to do my role as primary carer for my mum who has progressive incurable neurological conditions Parkinson’s and Dementia.”
Health, energy and Self Care are all priorities. I actively, daily and purposefully attend to these with routines and habits I choose. We can’t give from an empty cup.”
What are the 5 balls of life?
A speech about life being a game of ‘5 balls’ has been falsely attributed to Google CEO Sundar Pichai. It appears to come from a 1991 Georgia Tech commencement speech given by former Coca-Cola CEO Brian Dyson.
https://www.reuters.com/article/factcheck-quote-sundar-pichai-idUSL1N2SE1SE/
“Imagine life is a game of 5 balls that you manipulate in the air, trying not to fall these balls.
One of them is rubber and the rest is glass. The five balls are: work, family, health, friends, soul. It will not be long before you realize that (work) is a rubber ball.
Whenever you fall, you will jump again, while the other balls are made of glass.
If one of them falls, it will not return to its previous form. It will either be damaged, bruised, cracked, or even scattered.
You have to be aware of that and strive for it.
Manage your work efficiently during working hours, take the time to be assured of your sincerity, give the necessary time to your family and friends, take appropriate rest, and take care of your health. If you are gone, it isn’t easy to return as it was.”
My habits and routines for Health, Energy and Self Care, most done on a daily basis.
Drink a glass or small bottle of water (500ml or so) to rehydrate
Open the curtains to let natural light in
Using my Happiness journal to note
3 things that you are grateful for
3 intentions for the day, what would make the day great
3 positive affirmations
Review my personal mission statement, values, goals (morning and evening)
A few minutes of mindfulness / meditation with app or focus on breath etc
Choose and share daily positive quote on Happy Life Habits Daily Quote WhatsApp Group
Take time to Stretch / exercise by doing:
3 Sun salutations (surya namaskar from yoga)
3 pushups or situps or burpees
Recite prayers
Read a few pages of a book, watch or listen to something positive that I can learn from
Have a healthy, nutritious breakfast
Mid morning fruit break
Focused work
Planning
Regular breaks away from the desk computer
Go for a walk in morning or afternoon
Spend time with family/friends
Reduce mobile phone use during meals
Journaling
3 highlights or good things from the day
How could you have made the day better?
What did you learn during the day?
Go to bed around same time each day
Additionals that are not daily
Time for laughter – live comedy, shows, films, shared jokes
Live experiences: music, theatre, art, sport, travel
Sauna or massage
Time in nature, gardening
Volunteering, Service, Community, Faith
Reflecting on achievements/qualities – monthly, quarterly or every 6 months
These habits positively impact my health, energy and wellbeing and cover the scope of the 5 well being dimensions of Physical, Mental, Emotional, Social and Spiritual while at the same time releasing happy chemicals and flushing the stress ones away.
This is what I am learning
A friend said that they could not do the caring for a parent as it is a big commitment and sacrifice. For me it is not a sacrifice but a way of serving - though to be honest sometimes frustration and not having control on a lot of things makes it feel like a sacrifice. It’s a way of working through my karma.
This is what I am learning
Apply the tools, practices and routines, Develop Habits, Cultivate virtues. Reflect and Introspect. Accept reality.
Mindfulness, being present and in the moment
Slowing down
Centre and ground yourself
Understanding emotions better
Listening with full attention
Empathy, Compassion, Care
Connection is so important
Patience
Go with the flow
Proactive, Plan and focus on what’s important now and what need to be done soon
Focused moments of work
Self care, practices and routines
Sleep, rest and recovery
Keep being taught the lesson till we learn it
Resilience
Accepting the things I can not control
Responding rather than reacting
Not to take things personally
Fundamentals : Eat, Sleep, Move, Breathe, Focus
Very conscious of how I use my time, what I say yes to and what I commit to
People call less and visit less
“THE SPIRITUAL WARRIOR’S PRAYER
I pray not to be protected from life’s battles,
But to have the courage to conquer them fearlessly.
I pray not to escape from my struggles,
But to learn the lessons the universe is trying to teach me.
I pray not to work for fame and recognition,
But to make it my mission to love and serve others in all that I do.
I pray not to measure my wealth and success by what I own,
But by how grateful and abundant I feel in my heart.
And I pray not for my circumstances to change so that I feel happy,
But to be a beacon of light in the world wherever God places me.
”
For a better Future we have to be very Present when the Dementia patient is living in their Past.
Use it or lose it
As I have understood it, those who have Dementia have experienced a shrinkage in their brain. My theory based on what I have learnt and having no medical research is by keeping the brain active, learning new knowledge and skills, practising gratitude, journaling and mindfulness/meditation, exercising help to increase the neural connections, the grey matter and different parts of the brain thereby delaying or preventing the shrinkage. These practices also help our health, happiness and wellbeing.
The Heroic Coaching and App helps me with my Energy, Work and Love (Relationships/Connection).
Our 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Training Course I am immensely proud of as I feel it not only helps with happiness, mental and emotional well being, hope, optimism and resilience but also is releasing the happy chemicals washing out the stress ones. We know stress exacerbates inflammation and all underlying illness or disease we have.
People with Parkinson's don't have enough of the chemical dopamine in their brain because some of the nerve cells that make it have stopped working. Gratitude releases dopamine. What if the regular practice of gratitude releasing dopamines keeps those nerve cells active, healthy, working well and alive for longer?
The hardback, cloth bound Happiness Journal feels lovely in our hands, the act of thinking, reflecting and writing makes use of different parts of our brain at the same time (sight, touch, feelings, thoughts, memory, future thinking. motor skills etc) thus keeping them engaged and active. As shared in Gratitude is my Superpower - gratitude is a higher vibrational frequency energy.
We are going to run limited sessions of the 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training course specifically for:
Carers
Coping with Grief
General Wellbeing
For Carers attendees will only be carers giving it a particular focus and support.
For Coping with Grief attendees will only be those who have experienced a loss and are working through the grief process giving it a particular focus and support.
The General Wellbeing session will be open to all.
If you are interested or know someone who may benefit from either 1, 2 or 3 please join the waiting list or message me.
If you are involved with a charity or organisation that supports Dementia, Parkinson’s, Grief or Carers (for any condition) I would love to explore the opportunity to make the 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course available to support patients, staff, volunteers or carers with their mental and emotional wellbeing. Or to give a talk from a Carer’s perspective.
be part of the Happy Life Habits Community
Stay informed about Happy Life Habits activities plus add value information such as events, offers, articles, videos, quotes plus dedicated HLH groups.
Positively Impacting Happiness and Wellbeing Levels to go from theory to practice to mastery.
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Join the WhatsApp Happy Life Habits Community at
https://chat.whatsapp.com/FJ4vetMGbEIEd2hH5BRfU2
and sign up for emails at the bottom of the page.
Resources
Some films and books about Dementia:
Films:
You, Me Aur Hum - Bollywood movie with Kajol and Ajay Devgn. Powerful scenes including one where Kajol has gone shopping and forgets her way home.
Still Alice - Powerful story of a young professor diagnosed with Alzheimer’s after her 50th birthday.
The Father - very moving depiction with Anthony Hopkins
The NoteBook
Books
Mum, Me, White Lies and Tea: My journey into the heart of dementia - Ten lessons from accompanying my mum on her journey with dementia by my friend Nick Williams. (Get in touch if you want a signed copy).
Organisations
Parkinsons UK https://www.parkinsons.org.uk/ - great resources including leaflets on specific aspects
Dementia Club UK https://dementiaclubuk.org.uk/ - resources / training and support sessions for carers and those with the condition
Alzheimer’s UK https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/ - wonderful Caring for a Person with Dementia book (free)
Barnet Carers https://barnetcarers.org/ - local borough carers support
How mindfulness can help cognition https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/five_ways_mindfulness_helps_you_age_better
This has relevant content in relation to exercise and brain cognition.
https://youtu.be/UyNotKnAFkM?si=FEUF0gAGzl3wiYLp
Another great video that links foods, diet and dementia.
https://youtu.be/98szU7WJySk?si=uKcmni03JpDTd1t6
Shaileen Shah - Happy Life Habits Coach, Speaker & Trainer
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list and join the Happy Life Habits Community WhatsApp Group
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, YouTube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Happy Life Habits Positively Impacting Happiness & Wellbeing Levels
Back to the Future: Creating memories to Savour
The word savour (savor in American English) is an interesting word, it is a verb. It has at least 2 meanings in the dictionary:
To fully enjoy the taste or smell of something
To fully enjoy a time or experience
Back to the Future The Musical
The word savour (savor in American English) is an interesting word, it is a verb. It has at least 2 meanings in the dictionary:
To fully enjoy the taste or smell of something
To fully enjoy a time or experience
I feel the first definition is limited to taste and smell when I feel it should be all the senses. Another definition I feel encompasses the sentiment better :
to enjoy food or an experience slowly, in order to enjoy it as much as possible
This extends to one more which is the one we will use in this article:
attempt to fully feel, enjoy, and extend our positive experiences
The practice of savouring leads to more happiness. We can savour all three tenses of time: Past, Present and Future. I have enjoyed this practice. I share a few examples here.
Savouring the Past
Recently I enjoyed reminiscing about a convention that I co-led 20 years ago for Young Jains, a faith organisation I volunteer for. The experience 20 years ago was amazing, creative, high energy and innovative with wonderful team work. Individually I enjoyed seeing some photos, reading a souvenir magazine and listening to music from the event. We hosted a 20 Year catch up and some people who had attended 20 years ago joined sharing their experiences and memories. This led to a feel good energy, re-living the positive experiences and memories and a sense of community and connection. A benefit of savouring the past positive experiences is you get to live them again and create new memories.
Another example is Facebook popping up a memory from 2018 when we took part in a volunteering programme in India with the Jain school that we are part of. It brought back many good memories and associated with it good feelings.
What is a past experience that you savour?
Savouring the Future
I enjoy planning for the future, having events and activities scheduled in the diary to look forward to. These may be a holiday, trip away, catch-up with family/friends, visit to theatre etc. The anticipation and looking forward to generating positive emotions and good feelings as much as the actual event. An example of this is booking tickets for the Back To the Future musical months in advance of chosen visit date. Back To the Future is a classic film I grew up with so we are already onto a winner. Again looking forward to the actual day with much enthusiasm was wonderful. The musical did not disappoint; great sets, acting, humour, music and a De Lorean. It was a shared experience with my family. We created a memory that we can relish and savour in the future.
What is a future experience you can schedule to later savour?
Savouring in the Present
A key to savouring the past or the future is to be fully present in the present. To be mindful, engaged in the moment, aware and enjoy it. Some examples I have experienced are:
A few years ago I took part in a retreat where the meal at lunch time was in silence. I ate mindfully, chewing slowly, observing and enjoying each bite and chew. Savouring the taste, experience and textures.
During a full packed day with my wife visiting London we enjoyed St Paul’s Cathedral with a tour, boat trip on the Thames, lovely vegan meal, Mama Mia the Musical with a walk across Waterloo bridge at night time. Each of those moments I experienced being in the moment, enjoying it and not thinking about the experience before or coming after. This led to deeper enjoyment of each moment.
Ways to Savour
Journaling
The Happiness Journal (the 5 minute journal) we supply and use in the Happy Life Habits 30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course helps capture some savouring across the past, present and future with sections on gratitude, what would make today great and what was amazing about today.
Facebook memories
Capture memories in Facebook on your timeline and enjoy savouring when Facebook pops up the memory on it’s anniversary
Google Photos
Capture your digital photos and store them in google photos letting it pop up the memories on your phone. I enjoyed seeing memories from 14 years ago.
Create memories to savour
Book, schedule experiences and activities. Even better if you can book them with someone else to create shared memories.
Take photos / videos. My son recently turned 18. A great idea would have been to take a photo of him on each birthday and capture it in an album. Likewise for anniversaries.
Happy Life Habits events, talks, workshops and training are a great opportunity to create positive memories and emotions. The waiting list for the 30 Day Gratitude and Journal Habit Immersion Training Course is open.
We enjoy celebrating birthdays, anniversaries and World Days… see below.
Happy Life Habits us supporting World Values Day 20th October
Have a Great Day
There goes another day of your life. How did you live it?
What did you choose?
Happy Life Habits is celebrating the following upcoming World Days.
World Mindfulness Day : Monday 12th September
World Gratitude Day (Also International Day of Peace) : Wednesday 21st September
Shaileen Shah's Birthday : Monday 26th September
World Values Day : Thursday 20th October
World Kindness Day : Sunday 13th November
We hold dear Mindfulness, Gratitude, Kindness, Values and Birthdays as reminders of the things important in our life and essential for our happiness, wellbeing and a good life. An opportunity to celebrate, reflect, re-enforce and connect.
If you would like a passionate, enthusiastic, inspiring and encouraging talk or workshop on these topics during the World Day or the week the World Day falls in then look no further than Happy Life Habits. This is what we believe in and live by : Positively Impacting Happiness and Wellbeing Levels (every day)!
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day.
We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
These include the 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course and the monthly MasterMind Group sessions
Great investments that produce outstanding results - guaranteed!
The Happiness Journal used by Tim Ferris, Emma Watson and Shaileen Shah (pretty much every day for the last 6.5 years) is a great starter tool to shift your mood and develop morning routines. For a DIY option the journal is available for £27 (£30 inc p&p in UK, international please enquire. Order 2 or more journals at £25 each).
This is a perfect, unique and life changing gift that can be gifted for:
teachers at the end of the year as a thank you
Birthdays, anniversaries, weddings
graduations, new job
staff / employees
In fact it has been well received as a corporate gift by staff, clients and suppliers when given by my clients. (Enquire for bulk orders and add value workshops). A journal workshop and 30 Day gratitude & journal habit immersion training course (running for the last 2 years) are also available.
Contact Shaileen@HappyLifeHabits.co.uk for any enquiries.
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
The 7+ Highly Effective Morning Habits of a Happiness Coach
Recently I had the opportunity to contribute to a feature in the Metro on Tips for better/happier/mentally healthier mornings. I submitted my morning Happy Life Habits and was very pleased that they used a few of them. I hope you find them useful and take action to apply them. We have trained many on Gratitude and Journaling. If you need support you know who to call (Not Ghostbusters but Shaileen at Happy Life Habits!).
Recently I had the opportunity to contribute to a feature in the Metro on Tips for better/happier/mentally healthier mornings. I submitted my morning Happy Life Habits and was very pleased that they used a few of them. I hope you find them useful and take action to apply them. We have trained many on Gratitude and Journaling. If you need support you know who to call (Not Ghostbusters but Shaileen at Happy Life Habits!).
The 7+ Highly Effective Morning Habits of a Happiness Coach
Shaileen Shah a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer with Happy Life Habits loves morning routines to help kick start the day energised, focused, positive, happier and healthier. He has various daily routines that support his physical, mental, social, emotional and spiritual wellbeing - each only taking a few minutes to do before breakfast but the effects lasting throughout the day. Here they are:
Drinking water by keeping a water bottle by the bedside to rehydrate (we can dehydrate during the night) and activate the stomach
Opening the curtains and letting the morning sun into the room - helps the circadian rhythm
5 minutes of mindfulness/meditation using an app which has a few minutes of learning and then the meditation - helps develop focus, centredness and resilience (from my subscription to mindfulness.com, each month I have some 30 day trial passes I can share. Get in touch if you are interested).
A few minutes of stretching and exercise : 3 Sun Salutations (Surya Namaskar yoga), 10 press ups and 5 push ups
A short prayer - humbles and grounds
Recommit to personal mission statement - sense of purpose and meaning
An element of learning - reading a few pages from a book, listening to a podcast or going through material of a year long coaching programme he is on
Tackling a challenge, activating the brain, applying strategy by doing Wordle - a sense of accomplishment. Making the bed can give a sense of accomplishment too.
Using a Happiness Journal (which he has used for more than 7 years; now runs workshops on and trains people to develop a habit in over 30 Days) has these 3 morning activities done in 5-10mins
A daily practice of practising gratitude / counting blessings. This causes an immediate positive shift in mood, activates the learning centres in the brain and feel connected by releasing the happy chemicals dopamine and oxytocin.
Asking and answering “What would make today great?” helps focus on intentions for the day.
Reflecting on Positive Affirmations to help cultivate virtues and remind of strengths.
These habits are kept easy and quick to do so they actually get done. They prime his Mind, Body and Soul to bring his best to the day by being energised, positive, happy, healthy and focused for the challenges and opportunities that unfold.
Here is the Metro article with a great selection of tips from various coaches and experts, including me :). https://metro.co.uk/2022/06/04/27-expert-backed-tips-to-make-your-mornings-better-16757102/
2 Things you can help us with…
We are asking for your help on 2 activities for Happy Life Habits to grow and sustain positively impacting Happiness & Wellbeing Levels
(1) Help on renaming Happy Life Habits YoutTube channel
I'll be sharing some videos on YouTube which won't necessarily be immediately shared on Facebook, Instagram or LinkedIn.
Asking for a favour, if you subscribe to the Happy Life Habits YouTube Channel you will get the videos first and not miss any. Plus if we get 100 subscribers I can rename the channel from a random link name to Happy Life Habits. Really appreciate if you are able to subscribe to the YouTube channel and help us rename the link. After we have renamed, if the find the content not useful feel free to unsubscribe.
Here is the current link https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCxIVX_KsPU_1i_7GXZg1uBQ
(2) Opportunities to take part in podcasts, webinars, lives etc
If you know any podcasters please share this with them.
If you host a podcast, webinar or lives I'm currently available as a podcast guest.
I'm a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer trained in the Science of Happiness rewiring hearts and minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day.
See the poster for topics and here for past recordings of podcasts/webinars.
Been in corporate world experiencing work related stress, grief, mental health, work life balance challenges and have developed habits for positivity, happiness, resilience and productivity.
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day.
We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
These include the 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course and the monthly MasterMind Group sessions
Great investments that produce outstanding results - guaranteed!
The Happiness Journal used by Tim Ferris, Emma Watson and Shaileen Shah (pretty much every day for the last 6.5 years) is a great starter tool to shift your mood and develop morning routines. For a DIY option the journal is available for £27 (£30 inc p&p in UK, international please enquire. Order 2 or more journals at £25 each).
This is a perfect, unique and life changing gift that can be gifted for:
teachers at the end of the year as a thank you
Birthdays, anniversaries, weddings
graduations, new job
staff / employees
In fact it has been well received as a corporate gift by staff, clients and suppliers when given by my clients. (Enquire for bulk orders and add value workshops). A journal workshop and 30 Day gratitude & journal habit immersion training course (running for the last 2 years) are also available.
Contact Shaileen@HappyLifeHabits.co.uk for any enquiries.
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
What strategies do you use to keep calm through challenging situations?
On the Happy Life Habits Community Facebook Group we regularly share quotes, reflective / thought provoking questions, articles and events. We recently asked “What strategies do you use to keep calm through challenging situations?” and have a good response to it.
May prove to be useful this month as students get their “A” Level and “GCSE” results.
On the Happy Life Habits Community Facebook Group we regularly share quotes, reflective / thought provoking questions, articles and events. The below we asked recently and have a good response to it.
May prove to be useful this month as students get their “A” Level and “GCSE” results.
My friend Deepa shared a whole series of useful ideas many of which resonate with the Self care ideas we have shared in the past:
Wow, so many strategies to help re-set:
1. Movement - walk, workout, trampoline, yogasanas, garba!
2. Sing - usually devotional music, raises my vibrational frequency!
3. Talk to friends, seek guidance, especially if it's new challenges.
4. Rest, give my nervous system a chance to feel, heal. Guided yoga nidra is great.
5. Go out into nature, tap into the natural healing components of the sun, the greenery, water, earth, air.
6. Listen to relevant podcasts/clips which help inform so can take the next steps with more awareness.
7. Just be, take time to pause, to just be. It's not as easy if the mind is on overdrive. But needs to be trained, cultivated so that you have access to do this.
8. Give myself a chance to process the heightened emotions. Often in times of stillness, usually first thing in the morning or last thing at night - poetry comes out! Sometimes in the middle of the night too, when I wake up! (Journalling and gratitude also effective)
9. Continuous practice of meditation and prayer. So much inner power there.
10. Connect - find what works best for you to connect back to your real truth/soul centre, any of the above may help.
11. Sometimes watching funny shows, just gives you a light-hearted needed distraction!
12. Pranic healing.
13. Reminding myself of certain quotes, eg 'life happens for us not to us'. For our growth and evolution.
Oh I should write, I do a lot of venting out too I find that helpful, rather than bottling up.
Oh and also crying if your system allows, so healthy and releasing.
2 Things you can help us with…
We are asking for your help on 2 activities for Happy Life Habits to grow and sustain positively impacting Happiness & Wellbeing Levels
(1) Help on renaming Happy Life Habits YoutTube channel
I'll be sharing some videos on YouTube which won't necessarily be immediately shared on Facebook, Instagram or LinkedIn.
Asking for a favour, if you subscribe to the Happy Life Habits YouTube Channel you will get the videos first and not miss any. Plus if we get 100 subscribers I can rename the channel from a random link name to Happy Life Habits. Really appreciate if you are able to subscribe to the YouTube channel and help us rename the link. After we have renamed, if the find the content not useful feel free to unsubscribe.
Here is the current link https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCxIVX_KsPU_1i_7GXZg1uBQ
(2) Opportunities to take part in podcasts, webinars, lives etc
If you know any podcasters please share this with them.
If you host a podcast, webinar or lives I'm currently available as a podcast guest.
I'm a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer trained in the Science of Happiness rewiring hearts and minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day.
See the poster for topics and here for past recordings of podcasts/webinars.
Been in corporate world experiencing work related stress, grief, mental health, work life balance challenges and have developed habits for positivity, happiness, resilience and productivity.
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day.
We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
These include the 30 Day Gratitude and Journaling Habit Immersion Training Course and the monthly MasterMind Group sessions
Great investments that produce outstanding results - guaranteed!
The Happiness Journal used by Tim Ferris, Emma Watson and Shaileen Shah (pretty much every day for the last 6.5 years) is a great starter tool to shift your mood and develop morning routines. For a DIY option the journal is available for £27 (£30 inc p&p in UK, international please enquire. Order 2 or more journals at £25 each).
This is a perfect, unique and life changing gift that can be gifted for:
teachers at the end of the year as a thank you
Birthdays, anniversaries, weddings
graduations, new job
staff / employees
In fact it has been well received as a corporate gift by staff, clients and suppliers when given by my clients. (Enquire for bulk orders and add value workshops). A journal workshop and 30 Day gratitude & journal habit immersion training course (running for the last 2 years) are also available.
Contact Shaileen@HappyLifeHabits.co.uk for any enquiries.
Happy Life Habits rewires hearts & minds for better productivity, happiness and wellbeing in 10 minutes a day. We help you move out of the comfort zone and into the learning/growth zones. Our products and services help develop habits and continuous personal development.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Sometimes it’s just Mission Impossible
Sometimes it feels like Mission Impossible with the projects and activities we have ongoing with Happy Life Habits at the moment (most are this month!) however the Life in 3 Acts sums up Happy Life Habits’ approach. This is what we have been up to or have on the near horizon.
The Self Care Infographic has been well received and shared. It has help my business clients connect with their clients including past clients.
Kids Happiness Boosters for Half Term (completely new)
Gratitude Journaling for Happiness Workshop with Mind In Enfield and Barnet
30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course
Happier Relationships with Happy Life Habits
HLH International Day of Happiness Global Virtual Festival
Master Mind Group focus on Learning
Initial discussions regarding HLH taking part in podcasts or speaking at community groups and companies
ONE FOR THE KIDS, ONE FOR THE ADULTS (FREE) AND ONE FOR EVERYONE (FREE)
Happy Life Habits have got
(1) Half term Happiness Booster sessions arranged for kids
(2) Happier Relationships workshop for adults - Free tickets available now (limited number)
(3) Global Virtual Happiness Festival - for all - pre-launch early bird free tickets available now (limited numbers).
We have session suggestions from authors, coaches, trainers, speakers, comedians, chocolatiers etc that are being reviewed such as:
Nothing Links Like Laughter
Healthy Lifestyle = Happy You
Chocolate for a happier life
Mindfulness / Meditation for younger children
Center of Happiness
Like a Comedian
What's self care to you?
How to be kind to yourself when the world hasn’t been kind to you
If you would like to share/present/run session or have stall at the Festival there are currently opportunities to get involved
Sometimes it feels like Mission Impossible with the projects and activities we have ongoing with Happy Life Habits at the moment (most are this month!) however the Life in 3 Acts sums up Happy Life Habits’ approach. This is what we have been up to or have on the near horizon.
The Self Care Infographic has been well received and shared. It has help my business clients connect with their clients including past clients.
Kids Happiness Boosters for Half Term (completely new)
Gratitude Journaling for Happiness Workshop with Mind In Enfield and Barnet
30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training Course
Happier Relationships with Happy Life Habits
HLH International Day of Happiness Global Virtual Festival
Master Mind Group focus on Learning
Initial discussions regarding HLH taking part in podcasts or speaking at community groups and companies
All of these involve a fair bit such as:
What we are doing and Why
Research
Posters /Graphics for the event
Setting up/sharing HLH Activities on Eventbrite, Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, HLH Website, WhatsApp, Blog, Emails
Booking forms
Conversations with various parties and collaborators
Learning various platforms
I’m loving it, learning, growing, connecting, collaborating and impacting.
Sometimes it’s going to have to be Mission Impossible
Image from https://www.imdb.com/
I was only going to watch 10 minutes of the film Mission Impossible, again, having watched it many times before during the last 25+ years, it still entertains.
An hour and half later the film ended and I felt good. I felt good because the film has fast moving action, gadgets, plot twists, cool music score all keeping the brain engaged as the good guy wins.
Tom Cruise’s character Ethan Hunt shows resilience, confidence, resourcefulness, creativity and attention to detail to name but a few.
It has some iconic memorable scenes like Tom Cruise’s character catching the bead of sweat from falling onto the floor which has sensors to trigger alarm if pressure changes, the accessing of the CIA computer while dangling from the ceiling and the helicopter tied to the Eurostar train as it goes into a tunnel.
Which film(s) do you watch for 10 minutes again then end up enjoying the whole film again and what do you like about the film?
Kids Happiness Boosters for Half Term (completely new)
I really believe if we can introduce positive habits to children early on then they can develop and use coping tools for the rest of their life.
To find out more or book click here
Gratitude
We continue sharing and making a difference with the Gratitude Journaling for Happiness Workshop with Mind In Enfield and Barnet.
The January 30 Day Gratitude and Journal Habit Immersion Training course has just ended. Lovely sharing and feedback during the month and on the celebration call as trainees shared their experience and transforming shifts. Each iteration of the course has unique elements and new ideas introduced.
Our guest speakers those who had done the course previously shared the impact of the course on them. Terence shared how it helps him cope with depression with medication and the positive impact it has given him. The course brings so many positive elements.
Next course dates are 1st May.
Here is a guest speaker testimonial. Next blog will have another one.
Priti Shah - Debt Solution Specialist : Regional Director at Lightside Financial
Build Resilience and Mental Strength for the future
Resources that will help now, every single day and for the future for the rest of life
Benefiting from: Positive intentions
Setting the day up well
Think in detailed/ granular way
Feel happier from the morning
Discipline and Habit to do every day
Happier Relationships
Good healthy relationships are shown to lead to long, happy, healthy lives. February being the month of Valentines we have an event on Happier Relationships
It is for singles, couples, friend, groups, You!
It will be a mix of sharing some information, interactive discussions and fun games on the exciting Wonder platform. Come alone or bring a friend or few.
Master Mind Group (MMG)
The MMG had a bonus kick off meeting in January where we shared the focus for February meeting to be on Learning. Using our chosen platform at self pace we are learning how to learn effectively When we meet in the month each member will share key ideas from a book they have chosen on the platform as well as how they are applying the ideas. Examples of the books are: Limitless, Make it Stick, How to be a straight A student, Mindset, Flow, Deep Work etc.
I’m very much enjoying the learning process and look forward to enhancing my knowledge with the group sharing.
Happy Life Habits International Day of Happiness Global Virtual Festival 19th March
Imagine a Happiness Festival a bit like the Ideal Home exhibition with different themed zones, show stages with scheduled events and individual stalls. Multiple sessions running at the same time. Various Zones such as Laughter, Relaxation, Movement, Creativeness, Science of Happiness
The pre-launch free tickets are available for booking now.
For the last few years Happy Life Habits (HLH) has hosted and served during the UN’s International Day of Happiness (IDOH): 20th March and Mental Health Awareness Week (MHAW) :May.
In 2022 we are continuing this with an International Day of Happiness Virtual Festival on Sat 19th March 2022 (1 day before IDOH)
ARE YOU INTERESTED TO BE A BIGGER PART OF IT?
THE OPTIONS ARE:
Share a session for 15mins - 60mins
Share a session and also have a stall
Be a sponsor
For further info on any of these.
We have session suggestions from authors, coaches, trainers, speakers, comedians, chocolatiers etc that are being reviewed such as:
Nothing Links Like Laughter
Interactive chat about what makes us laugh. The what, why, and how to make it happen. Appreciating how it positively affects every aspect of communication, whether spoken or written, whether for pleasure or business.
Healthy Lifestyle = Happy You
We often think that when we'll be successful, fit and settled, we'll be happy. In this session we'll discuss the steps everyone can take to become more confident, energised and healthy and just be the best and happiest version of yourself. You'll get clear and easy actions that you can implement straight away and will give you a sense of achievement to help you take back control of what you think, eat and do so as to releasing the real you!
Chocolate for a happier life
An introduction to chocolate appreciation
From an OBE awarded chocolatier with over 30 years experience
Mindfulness / Meditation for younger children
Mindfulness activities and book reading
Center of Happiness
You can spend your whole life searching for happiness. Once you discover the center of happiness, your search ends and you truly start living a happy life. Learn what is that center and how can you connect with it.
Like a Comedian
There is a lot we can all learn from the approach we comedians take to our work. I'm not just talking about laughter, although that is invaluable. Our approach to creativity, our willingness to try out imperfect material in public, our connection with our audience. I will give people some tools to help free them from some of the stresses they encounter, especially in their working lives, based on the comedian's craft.
What's self care to you?
Self Care session - to provide an overview of what self care can be for you. An opportunity to consider the eight components of self care
How to be kind to yourself when the world hasn’t been kind to you
People will take away simple tools to help themselves when they feel negative emotions. These are simple and powerful and gives an immediate release whilst building our ability to accept our emotions.
These are some, others include book readings for children, financial wellbeing for kids, breathwork etc.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.
Self Care for Blue Monday
The 3rd Monday in January is known as Blue Monday when many people feel at their lowest, depressed and unhappy.
This is supposedly due to some factors occurring at a similar time which include Christmas being a fading memory, payday still a week away, January bills coming through, rest of the year still to go through, high hoped resolutions broken, cold, gloomy weather, pandemics, working in office/ from home, world crisis’ and such factors.
Monday Blues on Blue Monday
The 3rd Monday in January is known as Blue Monday when many people feel at their lowest, depressed and unhappy.
This is supposedly due to some factors occurring at a similar time which include Christmas being a fading memory, payday still a week away, January bills coming through, rest of the year still to go through, high hoped resolutions broken, cold, gloomy weather, pandemics, working in office/ from home, world crisis’ and such factors.
Ways to combat Blue Monday…
Seeing the beauty of nature ( I saw a gaggle of geese fly in V formation overhead)
Write down 3 things that your are grateful for
Take a moment to enjoy mindfulness and focus on your breathing, do a short body scan, a mindful walk or mindful eating
Read and share an inspiring quote e.g “Every day may not be a good day, but there is good in every day”
Tell a joke
Laugh out loud for no reason
Call a friend, have chat
Get together for a coffee or meal with a friend or family member
Happy Life Habits has created this useful Self Care infographic to help remind of self care practises for Blue Monday, working from home or working in the office and remind them that you are there for them.
You can share this with :
Employees
Clients
Customers
Suppliers
Prospective clients
Family and friends
By distributing via
Email
Website
WhatsApp/Messenger/Facebook
Intranet
Newsletter
Printing and putting on desks or office walls
To order an infographic with your logo and website : email us. Many thanks to the various companies/individuals who have ordered an infographic supporting the work we do.
The Self Care Infographic is based on material from this article Together in Isolation.
Click image to download a printable version
Future events being planned - opportunity to be involved
Last year we hosted a International Day of Happiness event in March using the Wonder platform and having multiple workshops happening at the same time. This year we are planning something similar for International Day of Happiness in March and for Mental Health Awareness in May.
If you would like to have a “stall” and host a workshop or talk or two then get in touch. It could be linked the self care infographic such as laughter workshop, Stress/Anxiety talk, yoga, meditation, confidence, self esteem, tapping, visioning, mindfulness, breathwork, tai chi, qui gong, art, poetry or such like. Ideally it needs to be positive, add value, sharing knowledge and practice.
All current events are in the events page
Company and Corporate Opportunities
We have a range of offerings for small, medium, large companies and corporates including talks, workshops, training and infographics that help with productivity, resilience, resourcefulness, positivity and mental wellbeing.
Get in touch if you think it would be of interest to your workplace for teams, network groups, well being programmes etc.
Feel Good Friday (Financial Wellbeing and consistent good money habits are good for our happiness)
I've learnt from studying the science of happiness that acts of kindness are good for us. We should do them regularly (even daily). One study additionally found that now and them by stacking acts of kindness together in a time slot such as a few hours or a particular day give a more longer lasting feel good factor then one a day.
Today I had the pleasure of stacking some acts of kindness together and getting this boost when I delivered books I had to local primary schools.
Recently my friend Will Rainey author of Grandpa's Fortune Fables ran a competition in which I won 5 copies of his book. 1 for me and 4 to give to a local primary school. I asked If instead I could give split the copies to give to 4 primary schools and Will happily obliged.
The 4 chosen schools are:
Dollis Primary School - My Primary
Whitchurch First School - where a friend works and where I did my first happiness / gratitude workshop for schools
Krishna Avanti Primary School, Harrow ( part of Avanti Schools Trust) - the first state-funded Hindu faith school in the United Kingdom (my son is at the secondary)
Millbrook Park School- a Church of England school where my nephew attends.
Here is a short note for the schools which Will wrote.
______________________________________________
Letter from the author of Grandpa’s Fortune Fables:
I wrote Grandpa's Fortune Fables to help children learn about money in a way which is fun and memorable. I strongly believe that children who learn about money grow up more confident, have higher self-esteem and less money worries as adults.
Learning about money shouldn't be boring and hence why I put the important lessons into fables. I still remember learning from Aesop's fables as they were read during the headmaster's assembly when I was at school many years ago.
Grandpa's Fortune Fables covers different money topics so that children learn to earn, save and grow their money whilst avoiding debt, scams and gambling. Empowering every child, regardless of their background, to take control of their financial future.
To help teachers (and parents), there is a discussion point, at the end of each chapter, to start a conversation with children about what they have just heard or read.
I hope you believe this book will be a great resource to the school.
If you would like to order more copies of the book, I am more than happy to arrange a discount for your school. Please contact me at will@bluetreesavings.com.
Enjoy!
Will
30 Day Gratitude & Journal Habit Immersion Training course
The January course has started well and we have incorporated some new improvements to the course including new content for the habits section of the Journal Workshop.
Waiting list is open for future training. Upon request we can do dedicated training for small teams, groups, family and friends.
One of the benefits shared from the course
The Gratitude Journaling for Happiness workshops with Mind in Enfield and Barnet are free and scheduled for February and March. See events page for details.
Last chance to join the MMG 2022
We have a bonus kick off meeting on Wednesday 19th January, last chance to join the MMG
Take a moment to reflect on the last year. Also look forward to where you want to be, what you want to have experienced and learnt by this time next year. Take control and supercharge your development in 2022 so when you look back you have grown and developed from where you are now. MasterMind Group is open for registration, you can register here
Here are some free opportunities shared to the MMG members that may interest you for your learning, development and growth, I will incorporate learning from them in HLH activities and the What I Learnt Today page :
What I learned today… #WhatILearnedToday
Learning, education and growth is important to me, helps us be happy, reduces chances of various ailments in older age As the year goes by I am collating some of my learnings and sharing here. Updates will be on an adhoc basis maybe weekly, maybe monthly, maybe longer. Some are posted on Social Media and they are collated here.
Looking Back, Looking Forward workshop attendees, now is a good time to review what you captured in the workbook and to do so on a regularly basis.
If you want to receive articles, information on events and support Happy Life Habits sign up to the join the email list.
Facebook Group, Instagram, LinkedIn, Youtube etc links can be found at https://linktr.ee/HappyLifeHabits
Shaileen Shah is a Happiness Coach, Speaker and Trainer. Previously having been in finance technology for the investment banking arm of RBS during the RBS takeover of Natwest, the RBS takeover of ABN Ambro and the financial crisis he has experienced the challenges brought by uncertainty, change and stress. He is certified in The Science of Happiness and shares through Happy Life Habits. Happy Life Habits Positively Impacts Happiness & Well Being Levels by creatively and uniquely combining Personal Development + The Science of Happiness + Spirituality. A business for Good. For more information see HappyLifeHabits.co.uk.